Ok, I know the people that like reading my stuff have been disappointed lately. I hit a slump. Well guess what… you guys want a rant, you’re getting a fucking rant.
I walk to work everyday, it’s literally across the street from where I live, we’re talking a 3 minute walk assuming no traffic. It also means I get to come home for lunch. I always check before crossing the street. Why? Because the “right of way” is BULLSHIT. Having the right of way doesn’t mean shit if you get hit by a fucking car now does it?! They’re bigger, you’re wrong. The car is right by virtue of mass. Yea if they hit you they’re in the wrong, but it doesn’t really matter to you of you’re dead now does it!
So… I check the street, cars down both ways far enough I can get across no problem. I start running across as I’m close to when I need to clock back in from lunch. Turn to my left… and there’s a car… about 6 feet away from me. I ran like a bat out of hell to get out of the way. And he roared through where I had been about a half second later.
I checked the fucking street, there was NOTHING! Get me? Nada, zip, zilch, we’re talking a number equal to the odds of Katy Perry walking into where you work and asking you out! This ass muncher turned onto the street, didn’t look where the fuck he was going, and almost ran my mother fucking ass down!
I did get a glimpse of the fuck head, he was on a god damn cell phone… which, by the way, would have been shoved up his ass so far he could dial it with his colon if he had stopped to yell at me. He’s lucky I didn’t get a better look at him or ethics be damned I’d curse his ass. I’d make his god damn balls fall off, by the time I was done it would look like he had an advanced case of leprosy!
This has been Gwen. Your very pissed off, ranting redhead. And ..|.. to the bastard!
Showing posts with label Rants. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Rants. Show all posts
Saturday, October 29, 2011
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Celebrity Bullshit
I know, I know. I said I wouldn’t (or would very rarely) cover celebrity bullshit. Tell them to quit giving me such fucking easy ammo.
Justin Beiber is in the news this week after his debut on CSI with one of the regular actors on there calling him a brat. Really? A brat? You don’t say. It couldn’t possibly be that he’s following in the footsteps of most of the other child singers is it? I mean Miley Cyrus, Lindsey Lohan, Britney Spears, and all the others have grown up to be perfectly stable individuals. Yea right. The only child/teen singer that I’ve heard any actual respectable conduct from is Taylor Swift… and you’ll notice she’s a country singer instead of a pop singer. Not that I think that has anything to do with it but its an interesting coincidence.
Anyways, Marg Helgenberger called Beiber a brat, on TV. Evidently the kid locked a producer in a closet and “put his fist through a cake that was on the craft service table”. Admittedly they both had it coming though. The producer was performing the unforgivable sin of telling Beiber what he needed to do *gasp* the horror! And the cake evidently made a crack about Beiber’s mother… something about her fucking a broken accordion to conceive him or something like that. Obviously both were well justified and the appropriate response to the situation and Helgenberger is just being mean to a kind and talented singer… and if I don’t stop that I’m going to form a sarcasm black hole.
*Puts on a 10/6 Mad Hatter hat* CHANGE PLACE!!!!
Paris Hilton has opened up one of her houses for rent. A 3,000 square foot house in the Hollywood Hills. Yes, THE Hollywood Hills. The Hollywood Hills that it is mandatory for all new celebrities, or people with too much money and a desire to have no privacy, must own a house in. This lovely sack of overpriced shit can be yours for the low, low price of $20,000 a month! Oh my god, only $20k a month?! Where do I sign up?!
The house includes a larger-than-life portrait of the socialite (ever notice that they always use socialite? Never actress, or celebrity, it’s always socialite. I think socialite is code for no talent.), a bedroom that is pink enough to even make me cringe, and I like pink... and evidently a pole somewhere for entertaining. I am not making that up, it actually says that in the article!
“The star's home is full of family photos and high-end finishes. And yes, there's a pole for entertaining.”
Besides the fact that you can rent her house, you get to sleep in her bed and from how the article sounds some of her wardrobe is there. Disclaimer: neither the realtor nor the “socialite” is responsible for anything you might catch from sleeping in the bed or wearing the clothes… take that as you will!
This has been Gwen. Your pissed off, ranting redhead. And Justin Beiber is probably going to rent Hilton’s house… he wants to try on the clothes.
PS: All the Beiber fans. FLAME ME! Please, leave me lots of comments. I’ll even leave them up to laugh at. You’ll up my traffic and get me some more intelligent readers.
Justin Beiber is in the news this week after his debut on CSI with one of the regular actors on there calling him a brat. Really? A brat? You don’t say. It couldn’t possibly be that he’s following in the footsteps of most of the other child singers is it? I mean Miley Cyrus, Lindsey Lohan, Britney Spears, and all the others have grown up to be perfectly stable individuals. Yea right. The only child/teen singer that I’ve heard any actual respectable conduct from is Taylor Swift… and you’ll notice she’s a country singer instead of a pop singer. Not that I think that has anything to do with it but its an interesting coincidence.
Anyways, Marg Helgenberger called Beiber a brat, on TV. Evidently the kid locked a producer in a closet and “put his fist through a cake that was on the craft service table”. Admittedly they both had it coming though. The producer was performing the unforgivable sin of telling Beiber what he needed to do *gasp* the horror! And the cake evidently made a crack about Beiber’s mother… something about her fucking a broken accordion to conceive him or something like that. Obviously both were well justified and the appropriate response to the situation and Helgenberger is just being mean to a kind and talented singer… and if I don’t stop that I’m going to form a sarcasm black hole.
*Puts on a 10/6 Mad Hatter hat* CHANGE PLACE!!!!
Paris Hilton has opened up one of her houses for rent. A 3,000 square foot house in the Hollywood Hills. Yes, THE Hollywood Hills. The Hollywood Hills that it is mandatory for all new celebrities, or people with too much money and a desire to have no privacy, must own a house in. This lovely sack of overpriced shit can be yours for the low, low price of $20,000 a month! Oh my god, only $20k a month?! Where do I sign up?!
The house includes a larger-than-life portrait of the socialite (ever notice that they always use socialite? Never actress, or celebrity, it’s always socialite. I think socialite is code for no talent.), a bedroom that is pink enough to even make me cringe, and I like pink... and evidently a pole somewhere for entertaining. I am not making that up, it actually says that in the article!
“The star's home is full of family photos and high-end finishes. And yes, there's a pole for entertaining.”
Besides the fact that you can rent her house, you get to sleep in her bed and from how the article sounds some of her wardrobe is there. Disclaimer: neither the realtor nor the “socialite” is responsible for anything you might catch from sleeping in the bed or wearing the clothes… take that as you will!
This has been Gwen. Your pissed off, ranting redhead. And Justin Beiber is probably going to rent Hilton’s house… he wants to try on the clothes.
PS: All the Beiber fans. FLAME ME! Please, leave me lots of comments. I’ll even leave them up to laugh at. You’ll up my traffic and get me some more intelligent readers.
Sunday, April 10, 2011
Friday
I am sure everybody and their grandmother that is reading this has seen or heard of the song “Friday”. The singer, Rebecca Black, is now famous for it. If only it was a good thing…
For those living under a fucking rock that means that the song/music video quickly went viral. Reproducing at an astounding rate and quickly being raised to an epidemic outbreak level by the surgeon general. The Friday virus is highly contagious, spreading by minor contact with infected individuals, and is the first case of a human virus being spread through the internet. (In other news the US government is trying to figure out how this was done for possible biological weapon use) It appears to be non-lethal, but small children, the elderly, and those with compromised immune systems are recommended to be closely monitored just in case.
Symptoms include: having the song “Friday” stuck in your head for days on end, randomly singing off key, and mild fever. Severe cases have been witnessed breaking out in (off key) singing in large crowds, making parody versions of the “Friday” song and music video, and being confused if you should sit in the front or back seat of a car (incredibly amusing to onlookers when you’re the only one getting into the car). Still, doctors recommend wearing a dust mask (because it’s funny as hell when you get a dust mask tan line) and seeing a doctor is you develop any of the severe symptoms.
Oh, and some random woman named Gwenny has developed a vaccine for the dreaded Friday virus, she is selling it out of her apartme, er… office for a mere $100. Supplies are limited, make sure you purchase your vaccination before supplies run out.
OK! Now that that’s out of the way, obviously this is my own mockery of “Friday”. What brought it about? Why the newest “Friday” parody of course! God fucking damnit how many parody’s of this wannabe kindergarten song (ok class, lets sing the Friday song! Saturday, Sunday, Monday…) do we need?! Including the original and the horrendous religious version above I know of AT LEAST 8. Including one by some boy band, Conan O’Brian, a 10 minute play, and a piano ballad! Ok, seriously! I get parody, have you seen this site? Half of it is parody. But things quickly reach the point where it goes from being funny to being “are people seriously still making these?” So to all the people out there… I have one request.
MAKE IT STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This has been Gwen. Your pissed off, ranting redhead. And I hear she’s creating a new song “These are all the things in my backpack”… I can see the parodies now
*sings* These are all the things in my backpack. Note-book, note-book, text book, hand-ful of pen-cils, text book, an entire box of condoms.... *fades out*
For those living under a fucking rock that means that the song/music video quickly went viral. Reproducing at an astounding rate and quickly being raised to an epidemic outbreak level by the surgeon general. The Friday virus is highly contagious, spreading by minor contact with infected individuals, and is the first case of a human virus being spread through the internet. (In other news the US government is trying to figure out how this was done for possible biological weapon use) It appears to be non-lethal, but small children, the elderly, and those with compromised immune systems are recommended to be closely monitored just in case.
Symptoms include: having the song “Friday” stuck in your head for days on end, randomly singing off key, and mild fever. Severe cases have been witnessed breaking out in (off key) singing in large crowds, making parody versions of the “Friday” song and music video, and being confused if you should sit in the front or back seat of a car (incredibly amusing to onlookers when you’re the only one getting into the car). Still, doctors recommend wearing a dust mask (because it’s funny as hell when you get a dust mask tan line) and seeing a doctor is you develop any of the severe symptoms.
Oh, and some random woman named Gwenny has developed a vaccine for the dreaded Friday virus, she is selling it out of her apartme, er… office for a mere $100. Supplies are limited, make sure you purchase your vaccination before supplies run out.
OK! Now that that’s out of the way, obviously this is my own mockery of “Friday”. What brought it about? Why the newest “Friday” parody of course! God fucking damnit how many parody’s of this wannabe kindergarten song (ok class, lets sing the Friday song! Saturday, Sunday, Monday…) do we need?! Including the original and the horrendous religious version above I know of AT LEAST 8. Including one by some boy band, Conan O’Brian, a 10 minute play, and a piano ballad! Ok, seriously! I get parody, have you seen this site? Half of it is parody. But things quickly reach the point where it goes from being funny to being “are people seriously still making these?” So to all the people out there… I have one request.
MAKE IT STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This has been Gwen. Your pissed off, ranting redhead. And I hear she’s creating a new song “These are all the things in my backpack”… I can see the parodies now
*sings* These are all the things in my backpack. Note-book, note-book, text book, hand-ful of pen-cils, text book, an entire box of condoms.... *fades out*
Friday, February 25, 2011
Super Mario Sunshine
About a month ago my computer went down for about 2 weeks. Long story short, a RAM stick died. Seeing as I don’t have cable this left me with reading, taking photos (which I don’t do much of during winter), and playing video games. So I read some and got 100% game completion on Super Mario Sunshine. Here’s a review!
First off, I know the game is rather old. I never got around to actually beating it before this so yea… you can just deal.
Overall Super Mario Sunshine is a rather good game. The controls are fairly decent, if you’ve played Super Mario 64 you’ll get the jumping down in about 3 minutes… the only new one is a spin jump. The FLUDD controls are… interesting. You have your standard spray nozzle, and a specialty nozzle. The specialty nozzles are a hover nozzle(which is the most useful), a rocket nozzle used to reach high places, and a dash nozzle which has about 3-4 uses in the entire game. Yes, the dash nozzle is that useless. The biggest change is that Mario can no longer punch. Evidently holding onto the FLUDD controls tires out his arms too much or something.
The voice acting is kind of sketchy. Mario doesn’t actually talk, although he does make his standard noises when hurt. I hear a lot of complaints about FLUDD, but honestly its supposed to sound like a computer voice. In that aspect I actually think it’s the 2nd best done voice in the game, although it talks too damn much when it does talk. The mushroom people and most of the random NPCs don’t talk usually other then some kind of “hello”. Princess Peach is amazingly badly done. She’s supposed to be an adult and she sounds like she’s about 8!
**********SPOILER ALERT!!! SPOILER ALERT!!!***********
Baby Bowser has probably the best voice in the game, he sounds like a kid but still menacing. He also seems to have the intelligence of a kid, seriously… Peach being his mama? Which is a nice surprise.
Bowser on the other hand has the worst voice in the game in my opinion. He’s the giant koopa of doom, he’s supposed to be deep voiced, have his menacing laugh. Vicious, dangerous. DIE MARIO DIE! If you played Mario 64 I am sure you remember his laugh whenever you entered one of his levels. But NO!!!!! He sounds old and tired. He doesn’t even roar! I get that he is supposed to play father figure for his son kind of in this game at the end. But he is still the main Mario villain and instead of “THE PRINCESS IS MINE! EAT FLAME!!!!!” he splashes his bathwater at you!
***************END SPOILER********************
The music is good, nothing too terribly memorable but it matches the setting of the game and what you’re doing at the time. It’s Nintendo, so this is kind of a given.
My only real complaint, aside from the voice acting, is the blue coins and some of the mini-games to get Shines.
Most of the mini-games are rather fun, nothing I’d play again just for the hell of it, but they’re not bad. A couple of them though are damn horribly involved to get to and harder then the final boss level! There’s one in the main level hub that will take you at least 5 minutes just to get to, and when you do you need to have at least 30 lives because you will die in it that much.
The blue coins are another issue. There are 240 blue coins in the game, you can exchange 10 coins for “that”… that of course being a Shine. I’m used to hunting for items. Some of my favorite games are Metroid and Zelda, both of which revolve around finding hidden items. If I hadn’t had a game guide I would’ve never found some of them they’re hidden in such exoteric spots. In one world for example half the world is a beach… there are 3 Shine paintings under the sand… each holding a blue coin. You are not going to find them without some kind of guide. In another level you have to hose down a certain fruit basket to get a blue coin. Again… who is going to think to water the fruit basket?
Overall, not a bad game. No where near the best Mario game. But if you have a Wii it might be worth picking up, just remember to find a guide online if you want to get all the blue coins, and hence Shines.
This has been Gwen. Your pissed off, ranting redhead. And I prefer when all Bowser did was laugh and roar.
First off, I know the game is rather old. I never got around to actually beating it before this so yea… you can just deal.
Overall Super Mario Sunshine is a rather good game. The controls are fairly decent, if you’ve played Super Mario 64 you’ll get the jumping down in about 3 minutes… the only new one is a spin jump. The FLUDD controls are… interesting. You have your standard spray nozzle, and a specialty nozzle. The specialty nozzles are a hover nozzle(which is the most useful), a rocket nozzle used to reach high places, and a dash nozzle which has about 3-4 uses in the entire game. Yes, the dash nozzle is that useless. The biggest change is that Mario can no longer punch. Evidently holding onto the FLUDD controls tires out his arms too much or something.
The voice acting is kind of sketchy. Mario doesn’t actually talk, although he does make his standard noises when hurt. I hear a lot of complaints about FLUDD, but honestly its supposed to sound like a computer voice. In that aspect I actually think it’s the 2nd best done voice in the game, although it talks too damn much when it does talk. The mushroom people and most of the random NPCs don’t talk usually other then some kind of “hello”. Princess Peach is amazingly badly done. She’s supposed to be an adult and she sounds like she’s about 8!
**********SPOILER ALERT!!! SPOILER ALERT!!!***********
Baby Bowser has probably the best voice in the game, he sounds like a kid but still menacing. He also seems to have the intelligence of a kid, seriously… Peach being his mama? Which is a nice surprise.
Bowser on the other hand has the worst voice in the game in my opinion. He’s the giant koopa of doom, he’s supposed to be deep voiced, have his menacing laugh. Vicious, dangerous. DIE MARIO DIE! If you played Mario 64 I am sure you remember his laugh whenever you entered one of his levels. But NO!!!!! He sounds old and tired. He doesn’t even roar! I get that he is supposed to play father figure for his son kind of in this game at the end. But he is still the main Mario villain and instead of “THE PRINCESS IS MINE! EAT FLAME!!!!!” he splashes his bathwater at you!
***************END SPOILER********************
The music is good, nothing too terribly memorable but it matches the setting of the game and what you’re doing at the time. It’s Nintendo, so this is kind of a given.
My only real complaint, aside from the voice acting, is the blue coins and some of the mini-games to get Shines.
Most of the mini-games are rather fun, nothing I’d play again just for the hell of it, but they’re not bad. A couple of them though are damn horribly involved to get to and harder then the final boss level! There’s one in the main level hub that will take you at least 5 minutes just to get to, and when you do you need to have at least 30 lives because you will die in it that much.
The blue coins are another issue. There are 240 blue coins in the game, you can exchange 10 coins for “that”… that of course being a Shine. I’m used to hunting for items. Some of my favorite games are Metroid and Zelda, both of which revolve around finding hidden items. If I hadn’t had a game guide I would’ve never found some of them they’re hidden in such exoteric spots. In one world for example half the world is a beach… there are 3 Shine paintings under the sand… each holding a blue coin. You are not going to find them without some kind of guide. In another level you have to hose down a certain fruit basket to get a blue coin. Again… who is going to think to water the fruit basket?
Overall, not a bad game. No where near the best Mario game. But if you have a Wii it might be worth picking up, just remember to find a guide online if you want to get all the blue coins, and hence Shines.
This has been Gwen. Your pissed off, ranting redhead. And I prefer when all Bowser did was laugh and roar.
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Black History Month
I am white, if you look at my photo on this blog that is fairly evident. That being said it usually means that I can not get away with the stuff other people can without causing a scandal. If I actually cared about that this blog would be very boring though… on with the discrepancy!!!!!!
I don’t care about black history month. It means absolutely nothing to me. Before you go “OMFG GWEN IS A RACISTTTTT!!!!!!!@! WE MUST BOYCOTT!” or call Al Sharpton… actually do call Al Sharpton, I’d take great pleasure in blasting that racist’s arguments to dust. Er, where was I… oh yes, before you go being an idiot let me explain.
I do not really care about history in general. I know some of it, but rarely the names or dates or the person’s race for the most part, because I don’t view it as important. I know a black man invented peanut butter and a few hundred other uses for peanuts, don’t ask me his name though, I don’t view it as important. Does it matter that the guy was black now, not really. I ALSO know we have the first black president in the White House, Barack Obama. And about the Crusades (they all failed just so you know… think about that before you say you’re “going on a crusade”), the Great Library of Alexandria which unfortunately got burned down, and various other things.
So, we have black history month… where is white history month? Don’t tell me it is always “white history month” because that is BULLSHIT! So where is white history month? How about Asian history month? Latino history month? Oh, its because they were oppressed and made slaves. I did say I know my history… EVERY race has, at one time, been slaves to another and the slave owner. I am not doing your research for you, you can look it up yourself. It just happens that black people being enslaved is the most recent. So if we’re doing it because they were oppressed then why do we not have Indian (native American) history month? We almost completely wiped them out! And don’t say it’s Thanksgiving, if anything that seems to be celebrating it.
Ok, that’s it, I’m done.
This has been Gwen. Your pissed off, ranting redhead. And black history month sucks and Sharpton can kiss my ass.
I don’t care about black history month. It means absolutely nothing to me. Before you go “OMFG GWEN IS A RACISTTTTT!!!!!!!@! WE MUST BOYCOTT!” or call Al Sharpton… actually do call Al Sharpton, I’d take great pleasure in blasting that racist’s arguments to dust. Er, where was I… oh yes, before you go being an idiot let me explain.
I do not really care about history in general. I know some of it, but rarely the names or dates or the person’s race for the most part, because I don’t view it as important. I know a black man invented peanut butter and a few hundred other uses for peanuts, don’t ask me his name though, I don’t view it as important. Does it matter that the guy was black now, not really. I ALSO know we have the first black president in the White House, Barack Obama. And about the Crusades (they all failed just so you know… think about that before you say you’re “going on a crusade”), the Great Library of Alexandria which unfortunately got burned down, and various other things.
So, we have black history month… where is white history month? Don’t tell me it is always “white history month” because that is BULLSHIT! So where is white history month? How about Asian history month? Latino history month? Oh, its because they were oppressed and made slaves. I did say I know my history… EVERY race has, at one time, been slaves to another and the slave owner. I am not doing your research for you, you can look it up yourself. It just happens that black people being enslaved is the most recent. So if we’re doing it because they were oppressed then why do we not have Indian (native American) history month? We almost completely wiped them out! And don’t say it’s Thanksgiving, if anything that seems to be celebrating it.
Ok, that’s it, I’m done.
This has been Gwen. Your pissed off, ranting redhead. And black history month sucks and Sharpton can kiss my ass.
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Valentine's Gifts
This rant is mostly directed towards guy’s getting their girlfriend/wife a gift. I went into a grocery store the other day. Not unusual… I do like to eat after all. And I heard a Valentine’s Day advertisement over their radio.
If you haven’t read the last post I made I am not exactly a fan of Valentine’s Day. I find it kind of crass to go “OMFG! IT IS LOVER’S DAY! YOU MUST GET YOUR LOVER GIFTS!!!!!” Oh, and making it mandatory to buy roses in the dead of winter… yea, THAT’S not a way to try to make a premium off cut roses.
That being said, if I ever got what was advertised as a gift for Valentine’s Day in that commercial whoever gave it would be single really god damn quick.
“Gift cards make a perfect gift for Valentine’s Day!”
Gift cards…
You give a gift card when you have literally no idea what to give, that’s why they’re now staples for relatives at Christmas. You do not give a gift card to your lover on Valentine’s Day! Roses? Fine. Chocolate? I have a weakness for chocolate, I’m a happy girl. Stuffed animals? Are we back in grade school again? But a gift card? The only even remotely acceptable one is to a spa, and those come as gift certificates showing you did actually think.
For all those reading I’ll give you some advice. If you are doing Valentine’s Day plan something with your love. Make the gift something non-cliché. A lot of us like getting dressed up. Something romantic is almost always a good bet, whether at home or out. Romantic does not have to be expensive either, some candles help a lot. And for the love of the Goddess don’t buy a fucking gift card!
This has been Gwen. Your pissed off, ranting redhead. And this is probably not the last for the Valentine’s Day topic.
If you haven’t read the last post I made I am not exactly a fan of Valentine’s Day. I find it kind of crass to go “OMFG! IT IS LOVER’S DAY! YOU MUST GET YOUR LOVER GIFTS!!!!!” Oh, and making it mandatory to buy roses in the dead of winter… yea, THAT’S not a way to try to make a premium off cut roses.
That being said, if I ever got what was advertised as a gift for Valentine’s Day in that commercial whoever gave it would be single really god damn quick.
“Gift cards make a perfect gift for Valentine’s Day!”
Gift cards…
You give a gift card when you have literally no idea what to give, that’s why they’re now staples for relatives at Christmas. You do not give a gift card to your lover on Valentine’s Day! Roses? Fine. Chocolate? I have a weakness for chocolate, I’m a happy girl. Stuffed animals? Are we back in grade school again? But a gift card? The only even remotely acceptable one is to a spa, and those come as gift certificates showing you did actually think.
For all those reading I’ll give you some advice. If you are doing Valentine’s Day plan something with your love. Make the gift something non-cliché. A lot of us like getting dressed up. Something romantic is almost always a good bet, whether at home or out. Romantic does not have to be expensive either, some candles help a lot. And for the love of the Goddess don’t buy a fucking gift card!
This has been Gwen. Your pissed off, ranting redhead. And this is probably not the last for the Valentine’s Day topic.
Valentine's Day
Ahhhhh, Spring. I love Spring, the birds are chirping, flowers blooming, the smell of love in the air. Wait... what do you mean its not Spring?! Then why am I smelling love in the air? Oh, Valentines Day is coming up. *groans*
I don't hate Valentines Day but I sure don't like it. Why? Hmmmmm, how about because its a conspiracy by the candy, florist, and card companies to sell more merchandise.
Seriously, Valentines is the time of the year when chocolate sales jump through the roof, about the only other time that rivals it is Halloween, and that’s to be given out to tons of kids, not just to your mate. At least the price of the chocolate stays pretty constant for Valentines... I can't say the same thing about the cost of roses. Year round you can find a dozen roses for decent prices... until about the week before Valentines. Then the roses swallow a whole bunch of love steroids (SUPER ROSES HO!!!!!) and the price inflates to $30-$50 a dozen! I don't know about you but if my mate is shelling out $50 the flowers better last more then a bloody week. And no, I'm not getting into the cards.
Another reason? Well, quite frankly I just don't like being told to buy shit for people because I "love" or "like" them.
I do know why people with a partner like Valentines though. Guys like it because its a date they don't have to really remember. There’s so much advertising and crap being sold(at greatly inflated prices) that you'd have to be deaf and blind to not notice. Women like it because the guys remember it(for above said reason) and we get stuff.
The thing is buying your mate something for Valentines doesn't show you love them though. All it shows is that you got pulled into the commercialization around the holiday. If you really want to show your mate you love them then you should show it throughout the year. Buy them something just for the hell of it, plan something romantic as a surprise(lets face it, romantic stuff is NOT a surprise on Valentines Day), save that $30-$50 and create an entire rose garden! Use your imagination. Hell, I'd love a rose garden over week old dead roses!
This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead. And I’m going to lil cupid so I can steal his bow and shoot people in the… *TWANG!* OUCH! Ohhh, honey… lets get married…
I don't hate Valentines Day but I sure don't like it. Why? Hmmmmm, how about because its a conspiracy by the candy, florist, and card companies to sell more merchandise.
Seriously, Valentines is the time of the year when chocolate sales jump through the roof, about the only other time that rivals it is Halloween, and that’s to be given out to tons of kids, not just to your mate. At least the price of the chocolate stays pretty constant for Valentines... I can't say the same thing about the cost of roses. Year round you can find a dozen roses for decent prices... until about the week before Valentines. Then the roses swallow a whole bunch of love steroids (SUPER ROSES HO!!!!!) and the price inflates to $30-$50 a dozen! I don't know about you but if my mate is shelling out $50 the flowers better last more then a bloody week. And no, I'm not getting into the cards.
Another reason? Well, quite frankly I just don't like being told to buy shit for people because I "love" or "like" them.
I do know why people with a partner like Valentines though. Guys like it because its a date they don't have to really remember. There’s so much advertising and crap being sold(at greatly inflated prices) that you'd have to be deaf and blind to not notice. Women like it because the guys remember it(for above said reason) and we get stuff.
The thing is buying your mate something for Valentines doesn't show you love them though. All it shows is that you got pulled into the commercialization around the holiday. If you really want to show your mate you love them then you should show it throughout the year. Buy them something just for the hell of it, plan something romantic as a surprise(lets face it, romantic stuff is NOT a surprise on Valentines Day), save that $30-$50 and create an entire rose garden! Use your imagination. Hell, I'd love a rose garden over week old dead roses!
This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead. And I’m going to lil cupid so I can steal his bow and shoot people in the… *TWANG!* OUCH! Ohhh, honey… lets get married…
Sunday, December 19, 2010
Don't Ask, Don't Tell
IT’S THE BEGINNING OF THE END!!!!
Sorry, I had to do the Mortal Kombat quote.
Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell (DADT henceforth) got repealed today. For those ignorant to it, DADT was pretty much in the military people couldn’t ask you if you were gay, and you couldn’t tell. And if you got found out you got discharged (read: fired).
On the one hand it’s not important, especially in a combat situation, what sex you prefer. And unless you’re in a undercover op where you have to seduce somebody I don’t see it coming up when you’re working.
But the enlisted do talk. They talk about their girlfriends/boyfriends/spouse back home. For example Soldier 1, 2, and 3 are talking about their girlfriends’ back home
Soldier 1: How about you Private Pile, you have a girl back home?
Closeted Soldier: No, I don’t have one back home.
Soldier 2: You don’t have a girl? Guys we need to buy Pile a lap dance at the strip club!
Closeted Soldier: No that’s ok…
Soldier 1 and 3: YAY!
So now Private Pile has the choice of either refusing (which most straight single men in the military wouldn’t and will probably raise questions) or getting a lap dance that he’s not going to enjoy.
On the other hand what sex you like doesn’t matter! Why does it matter whether Private Pile gets a stiffy over boobs or a dick? Are you straight? Yes, then he doesn’t want you! Yes he may fantasize about you when he’s doing his thing, but you fantasize about lesbians, and they sure as hell don’t want you!
Also it’s very fucking insulting to the soldiers. DADT implies that they can’t handle working with other soldiers that may be a little light on their feet. They’re supposed to be “The best, of the best, of the best, Sir!” (Men in Black) Quit treating them like they’re fucking babies! There are people in the military that are prejudiced. There are people that don’t like blacks, definitely ones that don’t like Muslims; there are the bigoted Christians that don’t have any issue trying to force their view on others. (Don’t take my word for it, look here) The homophobes can deal just as well as the white supremacists.
Goddess forbid they have to serve with *GASP* gay people! Oh, that’s right, they already are. They just don’t know it! And what are they going to do when they get out of the military? It’s illegal in most (I think most, not bothering to check) states to fire somebody because they’re gay.
Back to my starting quote. This could very well be the beginning of the end, the end of anti-gay laws. This could very well be the hypothetical pebble that starts the landslide for gay rights, including gay marriage. Maybe I’m reading too much into it, but one can hope.
This has been Gwen. Your pissed off, ranting redhead. And I am still not joining the military.
Sorry, I had to do the Mortal Kombat quote.
Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell (DADT henceforth) got repealed today. For those ignorant to it, DADT was pretty much in the military people couldn’t ask you if you were gay, and you couldn’t tell. And if you got found out you got discharged (read: fired).
On the one hand it’s not important, especially in a combat situation, what sex you prefer. And unless you’re in a undercover op where you have to seduce somebody I don’t see it coming up when you’re working.
But the enlisted do talk. They talk about their girlfriends/boyfriends/spouse back home. For example Soldier 1, 2, and 3 are talking about their girlfriends’ back home
Soldier 1: How about you Private Pile, you have a girl back home?
Closeted Soldier: No, I don’t have one back home.
Soldier 2: You don’t have a girl? Guys we need to buy Pile a lap dance at the strip club!
Closeted Soldier: No that’s ok…
Soldier 1 and 3: YAY!
So now Private Pile has the choice of either refusing (which most straight single men in the military wouldn’t and will probably raise questions) or getting a lap dance that he’s not going to enjoy.
On the other hand what sex you like doesn’t matter! Why does it matter whether Private Pile gets a stiffy over boobs or a dick? Are you straight? Yes, then he doesn’t want you! Yes he may fantasize about you when he’s doing his thing, but you fantasize about lesbians, and they sure as hell don’t want you!
Also it’s very fucking insulting to the soldiers. DADT implies that they can’t handle working with other soldiers that may be a little light on their feet. They’re supposed to be “The best, of the best, of the best, Sir!” (Men in Black) Quit treating them like they’re fucking babies! There are people in the military that are prejudiced. There are people that don’t like blacks, definitely ones that don’t like Muslims; there are the bigoted Christians that don’t have any issue trying to force their view on others. (Don’t take my word for it, look here) The homophobes can deal just as well as the white supremacists.
Goddess forbid they have to serve with *GASP* gay people! Oh, that’s right, they already are. They just don’t know it! And what are they going to do when they get out of the military? It’s illegal in most (I think most, not bothering to check) states to fire somebody because they’re gay.
Back to my starting quote. This could very well be the beginning of the end, the end of anti-gay laws. This could very well be the hypothetical pebble that starts the landslide for gay rights, including gay marriage. Maybe I’m reading too much into it, but one can hope.
This has been Gwen. Your pissed off, ranting redhead. And I am still not joining the military.
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
I don't know what to say...
You know, I sat on this particular article for a week thinking of how to properly respond to it. It was too important to make the Twit News… and the fact that I have kind of been neglecting the Twit News due to real life things. The article in question is this
http://www.pinknews.co.uk/2010/11/26/us-judge-says-lesbians-can-be-cured-by-male-soldiers/
Make sure you read through it, it’s only about a page on Microsoft Word.
My very first thought was… unprintable, even for me. No, that’s not a threat, nor is it a command for my lovely little minions to go do anything to him. You all know exactly who you are. It was just my first thought… then I thought of something better.
Now Judge Rapist, oh, sorry Judge Joe Rehyansky is openly advocating the “corrective” rape of lesbians because in his insane line of thinking after they’re raped enough they’ll become straight. Personally it would just make me want to stake you to the ground with honey on your dick next to a fire ant hill, but that’s just me. But Judge Rapist thinks that it’s a good way to “cure” lesbians of liking women.
Well then! If that’s a good way to convert lesbians to being straight then it sounds like a good way to turn straight men gay! Lets get together some of the biggest bears from the gay community and have them ass rape you until you turn gay. By your own line of thinking it WILL work, so they get to continue pounding your ass until you want the dick!
I know what the issue is, this pathetic excuse of a judge got turned down too many times by lesbians and now he’s bitter. His military record, being a judge, and his manhood (probably all 1 ½ inches of it) couldn’t sway the lesbians he found hot into his bed so now he wants to force them. Here Judge Shrinkydink. I’ll buy you a strap on, maybe it’ll help with your little dick complex!
This judge needs to have his robes taken from him and any rape cases that came before him re-evaluated. Anybody that thinks like that, much less openly advocates it in a public forum, does not need to be making decisions about other people’s lives.
This has been Gwen. Your pissed off, ranting redhead. And oh… come here big boy, you’ll do nicely. I have JUST the guy you should meet.
~I do not advocate ass raping this piss poor judge, nor staking him down with honey on his dick. I DO advocate firing him and bringing him up on possible charges though.
http://www.pinknews.co.uk/2010/11/26/us-judge-says-lesbians-can-be-cured-by-male-soldiers/
Make sure you read through it, it’s only about a page on Microsoft Word.
My very first thought was… unprintable, even for me. No, that’s not a threat, nor is it a command for my lovely little minions to go do anything to him. You all know exactly who you are. It was just my first thought… then I thought of something better.
Now Judge Rapist, oh, sorry Judge Joe Rehyansky is openly advocating the “corrective” rape of lesbians because in his insane line of thinking after they’re raped enough they’ll become straight. Personally it would just make me want to stake you to the ground with honey on your dick next to a fire ant hill, but that’s just me. But Judge Rapist thinks that it’s a good way to “cure” lesbians of liking women.
Well then! If that’s a good way to convert lesbians to being straight then it sounds like a good way to turn straight men gay! Lets get together some of the biggest bears from the gay community and have them ass rape you until you turn gay. By your own line of thinking it WILL work, so they get to continue pounding your ass until you want the dick!
I know what the issue is, this pathetic excuse of a judge got turned down too many times by lesbians and now he’s bitter. His military record, being a judge, and his manhood (probably all 1 ½ inches of it) couldn’t sway the lesbians he found hot into his bed so now he wants to force them. Here Judge Shrinkydink. I’ll buy you a strap on, maybe it’ll help with your little dick complex!
This judge needs to have his robes taken from him and any rape cases that came before him re-evaluated. Anybody that thinks like that, much less openly advocates it in a public forum, does not need to be making decisions about other people’s lives.
This has been Gwen. Your pissed off, ranting redhead. And oh… come here big boy, you’ll do nicely. I have JUST the guy you should meet.
~I do not advocate ass raping this piss poor judge, nor staking him down with honey on his dick. I DO advocate firing him and bringing him up on possible charges though.
Monday, November 29, 2010
Fashion 2
I wrote something on fashion when I first started this blog, my knowledge on fashion has not exactly changed much in 3 months. But I feel the need to comment on a couple of the “fashions” I’ve seen recently.
~Comfort pants: Call them whatever the hell you want, but they look like fucking pajama bottoms. Did you just roll out of bed? Obviously not since your top half is dressed decently. Are you pregnant? It would be understandable if you were wearing them while pregnant, baby belly is no where near comfortable. But you’re only a little bigger then me… and male. I put this one in the same category as wearing pants so baggy they’re falling off you… pure stupid and fucking lazy.
~The “Snooki Poof”: This one originated from Jersey Shores (or whatever show she’s on, I can’t be bothered to look it up) on, duh, Snooki. The producers must have been laughing themselves shitless when they thought up this hairdo… and then done that anime question mark above the head when women started copying it! If you don’t know what I’m talking about its this
Oh, I’m a tumor, I’m a tumor. I’mmmmmm a tumor, I’m a tumor! Seriously! The first time I saw it I thought “That poor woman” because I thought she had a decidedly large tumor! And then I saw more women with it and realized it was a terribly bad hairstyle. You people seriously look like you have a giant fucking brain tumor! What is in that thing?! A tennis ball? A pop can? Oh! I know! It’s a bendable dildo!
Ok, I’m done! This shit is making my brain hurt. Hopefully I’m not developing a Snooki tumor, er, pouf.
This has been Gwen. Your pissed off, ranting redhead. And oh god, there’s a woman with a Snooki pouf and pajama pants on…
~Comfort pants: Call them whatever the hell you want, but they look like fucking pajama bottoms. Did you just roll out of bed? Obviously not since your top half is dressed decently. Are you pregnant? It would be understandable if you were wearing them while pregnant, baby belly is no where near comfortable. But you’re only a little bigger then me… and male. I put this one in the same category as wearing pants so baggy they’re falling off you… pure stupid and fucking lazy.
~The “Snooki Poof”: This one originated from Jersey Shores (or whatever show she’s on, I can’t be bothered to look it up) on, duh, Snooki. The producers must have been laughing themselves shitless when they thought up this hairdo… and then done that anime question mark above the head when women started copying it! If you don’t know what I’m talking about its this
Oh, I’m a tumor, I’m a tumor. I’mmmmmm a tumor, I’m a tumor! Seriously! The first time I saw it I thought “That poor woman” because I thought she had a decidedly large tumor! And then I saw more women with it and realized it was a terribly bad hairstyle. You people seriously look like you have a giant fucking brain tumor! What is in that thing?! A tennis ball? A pop can? Oh! I know! It’s a bendable dildo!
Ok, I’m done! This shit is making my brain hurt. Hopefully I’m not developing a Snooki tumor, er, pouf.
This has been Gwen. Your pissed off, ranting redhead. And oh god, there’s a woman with a Snooki pouf and pajama pants on…
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
The Ruling Government (US)
Here are a few little known facts about the people running the country, by that I mean the House and Senate. Over 50% of them have bankrupted a business before. Many have been caught with illegal drug use, including former president Bush Jr. with cocaine use (I personally see nothing wrong with people doing drugs… victimless crimes can go to hell, and no I’ve never done any drugs and I’d willingly take a drug test to prove I’m not on any). Many use their status to have representative immunity with various illegal acts that they do, most recent I remember is a speeding ticked… the guy was only going I think 80 in a 50mph zone.
What I would like to see is a presidential candidate that has actually LIVED like most Americans do! Most of the people running the government are rich and have never actually lived like the people they’re supposed to govern do. How, the FUCK, are you going to govern a populace when you have no idea how they live?! That’s like the US bombing a Middle Eastern country all to shit and then trying to rebuild their government without knowing anything about their actual culture… oh wait…
Anyways, I want to see a guy get up on the stand and go:
“I’ve been addicted to drugs, I’m off them now. I’ve survived 2 weeks on nothing but ramen noodles. I’ve been homeless. I’ve worked a shitty fast food job. I’ve worked retail, and am now a manager at Walmart. I want to be your president.”
That guy gets my vote! He gets my vote because he knows how 90% of Americans live! I don’t care if you made mistakes in your past (as long as they’re not horribly broken ones: rape, premeditated murder, etc) as long as you learn from them!
This has been Gwen. Your pissed off, ranting redhead. And I will NEVER see a candidate like this.
What I would like to see is a presidential candidate that has actually LIVED like most Americans do! Most of the people running the government are rich and have never actually lived like the people they’re supposed to govern do. How, the FUCK, are you going to govern a populace when you have no idea how they live?! That’s like the US bombing a Middle Eastern country all to shit and then trying to rebuild their government without knowing anything about their actual culture… oh wait…
Anyways, I want to see a guy get up on the stand and go:
“I’ve been addicted to drugs, I’m off them now. I’ve survived 2 weeks on nothing but ramen noodles. I’ve been homeless. I’ve worked a shitty fast food job. I’ve worked retail, and am now a manager at Walmart. I want to be your president.”
That guy gets my vote! He gets my vote because he knows how 90% of Americans live! I don’t care if you made mistakes in your past (as long as they’re not horribly broken ones: rape, premeditated murder, etc) as long as you learn from them!
This has been Gwen. Your pissed off, ranting redhead. And I will NEVER see a candidate like this.
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Obama on Schools
I was going to put this into the Twit News post… but this got far, far too long to add to that. So for you’re reading pleasure, or masochism, here’s my opinion on Obama’s newest release on the schools in the US.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/yblog_upshot/20100927/us_yblog_upshot/obama-calls-for-longer-school-year
“President Obama said on the "Today" show Monday morning that American students attend school a month less than kids in other countries -- contending that the school-year gap puts them at a competitive disadvantage in the global economy.”
I won’t argue that a longer school year would help the kids in school because it probably would. His daughters also go to a private school because the public schools in Washington DC are utter shit (my words, not his). But I’m going to add my two cents on what else would help.
Here’s what else would help!
~Paying the teachers enough so that they don’t have to have a part time job with their students! You are going to high school, and you go every week because you’ll need your education to get a good job right? And then, at your part time job, after school, or on the weekends, or whenever, you get to work with your teacher who also works there… doing the same thing you do. Way to show an education is important!
~The school systems need to be completely, and entirely redesigned. I am usually not one for federally run anything, seeing at how pitifully they run things for the most part. But the education system I firmly believe needs to be federally run. Why? Lets say you live in Bumblefuck, Missouri. Your parents (and hence you) move to California. You are so far behind compared to the other students in your grade that you drop back one, possibly two grades! The system needs to be standardized so that no matter what state you live in you get the same education.
There is no reason that when you move from one part of the country to the other that you drop or jump one to two grades just by changing school districts!
And yes, as long as we’re making all the schools standardized I’d use the best schools in the country to make the standardization. And the kids would be moved to the appropriate grade. My apologies to the kids that drop back grades but it has to be done.
~I do not know if it is like this everywhere or just where I went to school in NC but you do not need 3 years of history! I remember you got to learn the state history all through one year of elementary school, again in middle school (junior high), and AGAIN in high school. Drop that down to part of a semester in elementary school and a full semester in high school and make the rest of it US history! Honestly if you’re doing the federally run school systems that should be the only difference between states.
Oh lookie, I learned about the Wright brothers in elementary school, and again in middle school… and again in high school… why?
~This is going to not be liked by a lot of people… but in high school have a “religious education” class. Not one teaching you a certain religion. The zealots would like that far too much, and it’s against the separation of church and state. No, a class to teach you about most of the religions out there; Christianity, Judaism, Islam, Buddhism, Hinduism, Wicca, Paganism, Voodoo, Atheism, Catholicism, etc. This is something done in several European countries and it does wonders for religious tolerance.
~Remove the “no child left behind” act Bush put into effect. Being able to hold a kid back one time in so many years does not help them. It just means they move on even if they don’t know the material they need to know for their next set of classes.
~And finally, put sex education back in school! And not this abstinence only bullshit that Bush pushed through. Teach them about condoms and birth control. Have them put condoms on bananas like they used to. Teach them about STDs and how a baby is made. They’re going to have sex whether you teach them about it or not, if you don’t it just means they’re going to do it the unsafe! And I can even give you proof on that! Look at the teenage pregnancies and STD rate since the abstinence only crap got put into effect. It’s more then doubled!
This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead. And now I’m going to go teach your kids how to put a condom on a banana!
http://news.yahoo.com/s/yblog_upshot/20100927/us_yblog_upshot/obama-calls-for-longer-school-year
“President Obama said on the "Today" show Monday morning that American students attend school a month less than kids in other countries -- contending that the school-year gap puts them at a competitive disadvantage in the global economy.”
I won’t argue that a longer school year would help the kids in school because it probably would. His daughters also go to a private school because the public schools in Washington DC are utter shit (my words, not his). But I’m going to add my two cents on what else would help.
Here’s what else would help!
~Paying the teachers enough so that they don’t have to have a part time job with their students! You are going to high school, and you go every week because you’ll need your education to get a good job right? And then, at your part time job, after school, or on the weekends, or whenever, you get to work with your teacher who also works there… doing the same thing you do. Way to show an education is important!
~The school systems need to be completely, and entirely redesigned. I am usually not one for federally run anything, seeing at how pitifully they run things for the most part. But the education system I firmly believe needs to be federally run. Why? Lets say you live in Bumblefuck, Missouri. Your parents (and hence you) move to California. You are so far behind compared to the other students in your grade that you drop back one, possibly two grades! The system needs to be standardized so that no matter what state you live in you get the same education.
There is no reason that when you move from one part of the country to the other that you drop or jump one to two grades just by changing school districts!
And yes, as long as we’re making all the schools standardized I’d use the best schools in the country to make the standardization. And the kids would be moved to the appropriate grade. My apologies to the kids that drop back grades but it has to be done.
~I do not know if it is like this everywhere or just where I went to school in NC but you do not need 3 years of
Oh lookie, I learned about the Wright brothers in elementary school, and again in middle school… and again in high school… why?
~This is going to not be liked by a lot of people… but in high school have a “religious education” class. Not one teaching you a certain religion. The zealots would like that far too much, and it’s against the separation of church and state. No, a class to teach you about most of the religions out there; Christianity, Judaism, Islam, Buddhism, Hinduism, Wicca, Paganism, Voodoo, Atheism, Catholicism, etc. This is something done in several European countries and it does wonders for religious tolerance.
~Remove the “no child left behind” act Bush put into effect. Being able to hold a kid back one time in so many years does not help them. It just means they move on even if they don’t know the material they need to know for their next set of classes.
~And finally, put sex education back in school! And not this abstinence only bullshit that Bush pushed through. Teach them about condoms and birth control. Have them put condoms on bananas like they used to. Teach them about STDs and how a baby is made. They’re going to have sex whether you teach them about it or not, if you don’t it just means they’re going to do it the unsafe! And I can even give you proof on that! Look at the teenage pregnancies and STD rate since the abstinence only crap got put into effect. It’s more then doubled!
This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead. And now I’m going to go teach your kids how to put a condom on a banana!
Monday, September 27, 2010
Door-to-Door Dumbasses
I’ve dealt with the door-to-door dumbasses before, they call themselves different things, Jehova’s Witnesses, Christians, Mormons, etc etc... they’re all dumbasses though. Today I had a pair of them come to my door, usually I torment them in some way or give them some smart ass reply depending on what they’re opening line is. I am sorry in advance, I had been awake for less then an hour and I wasn’t on top of my game. Here’s the one they got:
DtDDs: Hello, we’re from. Have you heard the good news?
Me: Yes, you’re leaving.
DtDDs: *blank stare as the door closes*
When the god damned fucking hell are you dumbasses going to learn that we don’t need you doing this door to door shit, or the pamphlet crap. Nobody reads your little pamphlets, we just chuck them in the trash. Or if they’re as spiteful as I am they’ll rip them up right in front of you.
Christianity is the dominant religion in this country at an astounding approximate 82%, that means that 4 out of every 5 people are a Christian. In comparison Unaffiliated (including Agnostic and Atheist) make up about 11.5%, Judaism is at about 1.5%, Islam about 1%, Buddhism about .7%, Hinduism about .4%, and other (which includes Wicca, other Pagan religions and New Age religions) is at an ever growing 1.4%. And yes, I’m aware that only makes 98.6%, that’s why they all say approximate or about.
EVERYBODY in this country knows about Christianity. We don’t need you going door to door trying to convert us, we don’t need your stupid little pamphlets. If we wanted to be Christian we would be! I mean it wouldn’t be hard, there’s a church of some denomination on about every other street in any moderate sized town. I can drive downtown and I will pass at least 5 churches before I reach there, and I live in a town with about 17,000 people (2000 census). This is opposed to where I used to live, which has 200,000 people (again, 2000 census). There you had one on about every street!
And if you turn them down, and don’t close the door fast enough they revert to “You’re going to Hell and God doesn’t want you to go to Hell!
God wants you to save me from going to Hell for not believing in him. The same Hell that he created to punish me if I don’t believe in him. So if I don’t believe in him then I go to the Hell that he created to punish me for not believing in him and the only way not to go to Hell is to believe in him… kind of circular logic there isn’t it?!
That’s it, I’m done.
This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead. And would you like to join me at the Church of Slammed Doors?
DtDDs: Hello, we’re from
Me: Yes, you’re leaving.
DtDDs: *blank stare as the door closes*
When the god damned fucking hell are you dumbasses going to learn that we don’t need you doing this door to door shit, or the pamphlet crap. Nobody reads your little pamphlets, we just chuck them in the trash. Or if they’re as spiteful as I am they’ll rip them up right in front of you.
Christianity is the dominant religion in this country at an astounding approximate 82%, that means that 4 out of every 5 people are a Christian. In comparison Unaffiliated (including Agnostic and Atheist) make up about 11.5%, Judaism is at about 1.5%, Islam about 1%, Buddhism about .7%, Hinduism about .4%, and other (which includes Wicca, other Pagan religions and New Age religions) is at an ever growing 1.4%. And yes, I’m aware that only makes 98.6%, that’s why they all say approximate or about.
EVERYBODY in this country knows about Christianity. We don’t need you going door to door trying to convert us, we don’t need your stupid little pamphlets. If we wanted to be Christian we would be! I mean it wouldn’t be hard, there’s a church of some denomination on about every other street in any moderate sized town. I can drive downtown and I will pass at least 5 churches before I reach there, and I live in a town with about 17,000 people (2000 census). This is opposed to where I used to live, which has 200,000 people (again, 2000 census). There you had one on about every street!
And if you turn them down, and don’t close the door fast enough they revert to “You’re going to Hell and God doesn’t want you to go to Hell!
God wants you to save me from going to Hell for not believing in him. The same Hell that he created to punish me if I don’t believe in him. So if I don’t believe in him then I go to the Hell that he created to punish me for not believing in him and the only way not to go to Hell is to believe in him… kind of circular logic there isn’t it?!
That’s it, I’m done.
This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead. And would you like to join me at the Church of Slammed Doors?
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Not a Michael Vick post
You know, I was going to make a post on Michael Vick being put back into play in the NFL. Please note I said WAS. I’ve decided the sick, dog fighting bastard isn’t worth my time or blog space. You can go to probably a thousand other blogs if you want to read about the asshole. I’m sure there’s plenty out there about how good it is for the game that he’s back in the NFL, and others on how heinous it is that they let such a bad role model back in. Sorry, but my blog is going to be Dick free… oops, did I say Dick? I meant Vick, how clumsy of me to say what he is instead of his name…
So instead of the post I was going to make on that guy, here’s the URL for a woman on Youtube whom I’ve taken a liking to. She makes some really good points in her videos and is rather amusing.
http://www.youtube.com/user/ZOMGitsCriss
This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead. And GET THE QUARTERBACK!!!!!!!
So instead of the post I was going to make on that guy, here’s the URL for a woman on Youtube whom I’ve taken a liking to. She makes some really good points in her videos and is rather amusing.
http://www.youtube.com/user/ZOMGitsCriss
This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead. And GET THE QUARTERBACK!!!!!!!
Saturday, September 18, 2010
Pope appologies for sex abuse scandal...
This one couldn’t wait until the Saturday Twit News post. Knowing my luck it’ll be the only good article this week, but oh well.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20100918/ap_on_re_eu/eu_pope_britain
“During his U.K. visit, Benedict XVI says he is ashamed of priests' "unspeakable" sexual abuse of children.”
I’m going to keep this one short… if the Pope is ashamed of the priests’ sexual abuse of children then he, and the Vatican, can QUIT SUPPORTING THEM! The priests already have a rule where they can’t get married or they lose their priesthood, make another that says if you molest children you lose it too! Quit buying them the best lawyers, quit giving them back their jobs when they get out of jail, or, quite possibly the most sickening, when a scandal comes up they just move the priest to a new district that doesn’t know about his pedophilic tendencies.
They get charged with child molestation then suspend their priesthood until the government of the country they’re in finds them guilty or innocent. And if found guilty then take their priesthood from them! If found innocent, then by all means give it back, I’m not for punishing the innocent.
But it’s not like this is a new issue, the priests have been doing this long enough it’s actually become a card for other sex offenders… “…well… I was raped by a priest when I was a child…”
If the Catholic Church, the Vatican, and the Pope want to actually show how “ashamed” they are of the unspeakable sexual abuse of children then they need to purge their ranks of these child abusing monsters! Until then, actions speak louder then any words you say and by keeping them in your church you show silent approval of what they’re doing.
Now, before I get grief from any Catholics. I have Catholic friends; they’re very cool for the most part, we don’t always agree on religious stuff obviously, but we get along fine.
This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead. And I say we bring back a proud Roman tradition and give the pedophile priests to the lions.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20100918/ap_on_re_eu/eu_pope_britain
“During his U.K. visit, Benedict XVI says he is ashamed of priests' "unspeakable" sexual abuse of children.”
I’m going to keep this one short… if the Pope is ashamed of the priests’ sexual abuse of children then he, and the Vatican, can QUIT SUPPORTING THEM! The priests already have a rule where they can’t get married or they lose their priesthood, make another that says if you molest children you lose it too! Quit buying them the best lawyers, quit giving them back their jobs when they get out of jail, or, quite possibly the most sickening, when a scandal comes up they just move the priest to a new district that doesn’t know about his pedophilic tendencies.
They get charged with child molestation then suspend their priesthood until the government of the country they’re in finds them guilty or innocent. And if found guilty then take their priesthood from them! If found innocent, then by all means give it back, I’m not for punishing the innocent.
But it’s not like this is a new issue, the priests have been doing this long enough it’s actually become a card for other sex offenders… “…well… I was raped by a priest when I was a child…”
If the Catholic Church, the Vatican, and the Pope want to actually show how “ashamed” they are of the unspeakable sexual abuse of children then they need to purge their ranks of these child abusing monsters! Until then, actions speak louder then any words you say and by keeping them in your church you show silent approval of what they’re doing.
Now, before I get grief from any Catholics. I have Catholic friends; they’re very cool for the most part, we don’t always agree on religious stuff obviously, but we get along fine.
This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead. And I say we bring back a proud Roman tradition and give the pedophile priests to the lions.
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Fashion
Let me be honest… I don’t know anything about fashion. The tree outside my living room knows more about fashion then I do. I wear what I like, not what’s “fashionable”. That said I am going to talk about a certain “fashion” I’ve seen recently.
I first started seeing it on guys about a month ago. The guys are in their 20s… the age where they’re highly prone to displaying their bodies any way possible if they’re muscled. I blew it off as another silly thing that guys do and that was it… That was until I started seeing women wearing the same fashion this week.
Oh, I forgot to mention the fashion. Take a tank top, cut the sides from armpit to about an inch from the bottom and there you go. Now toss it on a female body with nothing but a sports bra under it and you have the female version of the fashion.
Seriously… a bikini top in summer is acceptable. A top that shows enough cleavage that you’re a beacon for every eye in the room is a kind of slutty but ok. This just makes you look like white trash. If you walked around in nothing but a sports bra for a top it wouldn’t be half as trashy as this! At least then people would assume you were just working out.
Ok, ok, I know we can get away with wearing pretty much anything a guy can. But just as a lot of clothing is female specific some things, like this, are male specific! Even on males it looks stupid but it doesn’t look trashy.
This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead. And I am not cutting up any of my tops so I can create an example picture for this post.
I first started seeing it on guys about a month ago. The guys are in their 20s… the age where they’re highly prone to displaying their bodies any way possible if they’re muscled. I blew it off as another silly thing that guys do and that was it… That was until I started seeing women wearing the same fashion this week.
Oh, I forgot to mention the fashion. Take a tank top, cut the sides from armpit to about an inch from the bottom and there you go. Now toss it on a female body with nothing but a sports bra under it and you have the female version of the fashion.
Seriously… a bikini top in summer is acceptable. A top that shows enough cleavage that you’re a beacon for every eye in the room is a kind of slutty but ok. This just makes you look like white trash. If you walked around in nothing but a sports bra for a top it wouldn’t be half as trashy as this! At least then people would assume you were just working out.
Ok, ok, I know we can get away with wearing pretty much anything a guy can. But just as a lot of clothing is female specific some things, like this, are male specific! Even on males it looks stupid but it doesn’t look trashy.
This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead. And I am not cutting up any of my tops so I can create an example picture for this post.
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Bras
I went to Meijers today, Meijers is a store like Walmart for those that don’t have them where you live. Why? I was shopping… and they had some sales I wanted to check out. And I saw this on one of their signs in the store: Playtex Women’s Boxed Bras $X.XX
This got me thinking, if they specify the bras are for women does that mean that Playtex makes bras for men? Or even that there are bras for men? I was not aware there were bras for men. And no, transgenders and crossdressers don’t count for that, they’re becoming female and playing female respectively so they count as women for this!
I mean seriously, is some guy going to go into a store, wander it for an hour before hitting lingerie and since it doesn’t say “women” on the sign go “Well it dun’t say women on it so it must be meant for me!!!!” and Billy-Bob wanders up to the checkout with his new bra.
Ok, in all seriousness I have seen guys with bigger boobs then I have, and could probably use a bra. Hell, I’ve seen guys with bigger boobs then Britney Spears had after her boob job. But guys don’t wear them! They make a habit of going around topless even when they're hairier then monkeys and can scar small children! So there is no reason to put “women’s” on a bra advertisement! It’s a given, like the government being corrupt and door to door Jehova Witnesses having door slammed in their faces.
This has been Gwen. Your pissed off, ranting redhead, and if you’ll excuse me I'm going to go watch Leo buy himself a bra… just because I find it funny.
This got me thinking, if they specify the bras are for women does that mean that Playtex makes bras for men? Or even that there are bras for men? I was not aware there were bras for men. And no, transgenders and crossdressers don’t count for that, they’re becoming female and playing female respectively so they count as women for this!
I mean seriously, is some guy going to go into a store, wander it for an hour before hitting lingerie and since it doesn’t say “women” on the sign go “Well it dun’t say women on it so it must be meant for me!!!!” and Billy-Bob wanders up to the checkout with his new bra.
Ok, in all seriousness I have seen guys with bigger boobs then I have, and could probably use a bra. Hell, I’ve seen guys with bigger boobs then Britney Spears had after her boob job. But guys don’t wear them! They make a habit of going around topless even when they're hairier then monkeys and can scar small children! So there is no reason to put “women’s” on a bra advertisement! It’s a given, like the government being corrupt and door to door Jehova Witnesses having door slammed in their faces.
This has been Gwen. Your pissed off, ranting redhead, and if you’ll excuse me I'm going to go watch Leo buy himself a bra… just because I find it funny.
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Teens + Music = Hearing Loss?
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/us_med_hearing_loss_teens
Have you guys seen this shit? Minor hearing loss in teens… who would’ve seen this one coming? Oh, that’s right, anybody with a fucking brain!
Oh my god! NOBODY could’ve seen this happening! Wow! You put something IN your ear and blast it loud enough it can be heard in China and its going to damage your ears? Say wha? Parents have been telling their kids this since there were walkmen! You play your music too loud and its going to hurt your hearing, and oh, look… they were right, AGAIN!
I like loud music, I really do. I play the music from my computer and in my car loud. I have a MP3 player too, but I don’t play it loud from my headphones!
Honestly there’s not a helluva lot more I can say on this one.
This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead. And my hearing is just fine… AND WHATS THAT BUZZING!!!!!
Have you guys seen this shit? Minor hearing loss in teens… who would’ve seen this one coming? Oh, that’s right, anybody with a fucking brain!
Oh my god! NOBODY could’ve seen this happening! Wow! You put something IN your ear and blast it loud enough it can be heard in China and its going to damage your ears? Say wha? Parents have been telling their kids this since there were walkmen! You play your music too loud and its going to hurt your hearing, and oh, look… they were right, AGAIN!
I like loud music, I really do. I play the music from my computer and in my car loud. I have a MP3 player too, but I don’t play it loud from my headphones!
Honestly there’s not a helluva lot more I can say on this one.
This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead. And my hearing is just fine… AND WHATS THAT BUZZING!!!!!
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Stank!
I haven’t had much to bitch about lately… work is good, I love my new apartment, and in general life is pretty nice at the moment. Does that mean I won’t be writing any more rants? NOOOOOOOO!!!!! That just mean you people are going to try harder to give me something to write about evidently!
I work at a grocery store, what one I don’t feel like saying, as a cashier. Its fun, nothing like getting paid to flirt more or less. Unfortunately in the last week we’ve had some clients that need to have a biohazard sign hung on them! I’m serious, these people had an aura of STANK surrounding them that was so foul that the flies were getting high off them!
For those that don’t know there is a difference between “stink” and “stank”. Stink is “dude… you smell a little ripe.” Stank is “OMFG! I need the Constitutional right to spray you down with Lysol before I pass the fuck out!” Ok, here’s a hint to everybody out there. When you are at the grocery checkout and the cashier visibly takes a step back whenever they’re not handing you something that means you need to walk your cottage cheese smelling ass to the hygiene aisle and get some deodorant!
I had been of the assumption that the reason we had so many smelly people coming in was due to the weather… last week was hot enough to melt the fucking pavement after all. That and sometimes the larger members of society sweat more and smell more. I was just going to leave it at that but then yesterday rolled around! Yesterday was in the 70s, was nice… and we still had people like that coming in! The worst one was a woman only a little bit larger then me, and I’m freaking tiny.
Seriously people, you don’t need to be afraid of soap, it’s not going to hurt you.
This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead… and I’m going to go get a can of Lysol.
I work at a grocery store, what one I don’t feel like saying, as a cashier. Its fun, nothing like getting paid to flirt more or less. Unfortunately in the last week we’ve had some clients that need to have a biohazard sign hung on them! I’m serious, these people had an aura of STANK surrounding them that was so foul that the flies were getting high off them!
For those that don’t know there is a difference between “stink” and “stank”. Stink is “dude… you smell a little ripe.” Stank is “OMFG! I need the Constitutional right to spray you down with Lysol before I pass the fuck out!” Ok, here’s a hint to everybody out there. When you are at the grocery checkout and the cashier visibly takes a step back whenever they’re not handing you something that means you need to walk your cottage cheese smelling ass to the hygiene aisle and get some deodorant!
I had been of the assumption that the reason we had so many smelly people coming in was due to the weather… last week was hot enough to melt the fucking pavement after all. That and sometimes the larger members of society sweat more and smell more. I was just going to leave it at that but then yesterday rolled around! Yesterday was in the 70s, was nice… and we still had people like that coming in! The worst one was a woman only a little bit larger then me, and I’m freaking tiny.
Seriously people, you don’t need to be afraid of soap, it’s not going to hurt you.
This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead… and I’m going to go get a can of Lysol.
Saturday, May 22, 2010
Solicitors
Welcome everybody once again to my little corner of insanity. This particular lil rant was brought to you by me, the religious nuts, and the military recruiter that decided that decided a good friend was somebody he might convince to join up. Enjoy! :D
Ok, I consider myself a fairly reasonable person, but there are a few things that piss me off... racists, blue laws, a government so corrupt if it was fruit it would be a pile of rotten sludge, and people that try to sell me shit. I can't do a damn thing about most of that list... but I take great pleasure in tormenting the people that try to sell me random shit (except the Girl Scouts, cause they sell cookies :D).
Telemarketers! There’s nothing like a good telemarketer. I mean you only have TV, radio, billboards, newspapers, websites, movies, about every other medium I can think of and the slightly psychotic Amazon witch doctor down the street trying to sell you shit, why not add them calling you on the phone too?! They call you up, usually during dinner, or early enough that us nocturnal people are still zombie-like, and try to sell you stuff. Credit cards, time shares, vacations... doesn't really matter which since most intelligent people have the sense to just hang up on these spawn of Satan. Personally I say have some fun! Just about every phone has caller ID now, remember which numbers are the marketers and think up something insane. Be evil! Use your imagination! Let the sadism loose! Have them end up calling a murder scene... "I'm sorry but Mr/s. Smith is dead, this is the scene of a murder, can you stay on the line please..." and mess with them for a while. Or there’s always my personal favorite... "Thank you for calling the Satanic Ritual Helpline. If you are having trouble contacting Satan, press 1 now..." I have yet to have any nice little telemarketer stay on the line long enough to reach "press 1".
Evangelists (of any faith)! You know, its kind of pathetic that you can actually sell RELIGION! How one gets in touch with Deity has been reduced to people going around and trying to convert people. Them selling it isn't even what pisses me off, its how they go about doing it. I'll use Christianity as the example, but don't think for a second they're the only group that pulls this shit.
~"Become a (insert sect) or your going to Hell!"
~Handing out the little pamphlets that are a complete waste of time and paper.
~"Come to (insert church) and save your soul."
~Various Bible(or for other religions their holy book of choice) quotes they use to try and justify them pushing their beliefs on people of other religions
I could go on but why bother? None of their stuff works and just alienates their group even more. Here... try this, be respectful, don't tell us we're going to go to hell, don't sound like you just escaped from Arkum Asylum, and if the person isn't interested shut the hell up! And don’t print out a few thousand of those little pamphlets/books to give out. Any self respecting person is going to glance at it and ball it up in front of you, or (depending on how insulting they want to be) use it as a tissue and offer it back. You may not get them, but if you do the above you may convince somebody else that’s around that your place isn't half bad.
Ok, last one, I promise. Military recruiters! Everybody knows about the military, they know they can join up and make a decent wage. There are enough ads on TV channels aimed at my age group that it would be an impossibility for them not to know. So we don't need you guys going around to try to sell it to us! There are a number of things I have heard about various recruiters... lies, promises, and cheating on the tests to get people in. And to the military's credit they thrash the guy’s career when they find out, so out of respect I won't mention any particular case. But what recruiter in their right mind would think my friend Rick a good potential mark? The hair longer then most women's should be a clear indication that he's NOT a good target! And don't give me the crap about “serving your country”! There is more then one way to "serve your country"! Voting, is serving your country. Joining the military, is serving your country. Opening a business and contributing to the failing economy is serving your country. Not becoming a permanent leech on Social Services and having enough kids to fill a small country is serving your country!
And any combination of the above 3... telemarketers selling me religion, or telemarketers selling me the military, are the most evil of all things.
Ok guys, I'm out, I gotta go call the telemarketers and try to sell them a slightly used religious pamphlet.
~Gwen
Ok, I consider myself a fairly reasonable person, but there are a few things that piss me off... racists, blue laws, a government so corrupt if it was fruit it would be a pile of rotten sludge, and people that try to sell me shit. I can't do a damn thing about most of that list... but I take great pleasure in tormenting the people that try to sell me random shit (except the Girl Scouts, cause they sell cookies :D).
Telemarketers! There’s nothing like a good telemarketer. I mean you only have TV, radio, billboards, newspapers, websites, movies, about every other medium I can think of and the slightly psychotic Amazon witch doctor down the street trying to sell you shit, why not add them calling you on the phone too?! They call you up, usually during dinner, or early enough that us nocturnal people are still zombie-like, and try to sell you stuff. Credit cards, time shares, vacations... doesn't really matter which since most intelligent people have the sense to just hang up on these spawn of Satan. Personally I say have some fun! Just about every phone has caller ID now, remember which numbers are the marketers and think up something insane. Be evil! Use your imagination! Let the sadism loose! Have them end up calling a murder scene... "I'm sorry but Mr/s. Smith is dead, this is the scene of a murder, can you stay on the line please..." and mess with them for a while. Or there’s always my personal favorite... "Thank you for calling the Satanic Ritual Helpline. If you are having trouble contacting Satan, press 1 now..." I have yet to have any nice little telemarketer stay on the line long enough to reach "press 1".
Evangelists (of any faith)! You know, its kind of pathetic that you can actually sell RELIGION! How one gets in touch with Deity has been reduced to people going around and trying to convert people. Them selling it isn't even what pisses me off, its how they go about doing it. I'll use Christianity as the example, but don't think for a second they're the only group that pulls this shit.
~"Become a (insert sect) or your going to Hell!"
~Handing out the little pamphlets that are a complete waste of time and paper.
~"Come to (insert church) and save your soul."
~Various Bible(or for other religions their holy book of choice) quotes they use to try and justify them pushing their beliefs on people of other religions
I could go on but why bother? None of their stuff works and just alienates their group even more. Here... try this, be respectful, don't tell us we're going to go to hell, don't sound like you just escaped from Arkum Asylum, and if the person isn't interested shut the hell up! And don’t print out a few thousand of those little pamphlets/books to give out. Any self respecting person is going to glance at it and ball it up in front of you, or (depending on how insulting they want to be) use it as a tissue and offer it back. You may not get them, but if you do the above you may convince somebody else that’s around that your place isn't half bad.
Ok, last one, I promise. Military recruiters! Everybody knows about the military, they know they can join up and make a decent wage. There are enough ads on TV channels aimed at my age group that it would be an impossibility for them not to know. So we don't need you guys going around to try to sell it to us! There are a number of things I have heard about various recruiters... lies, promises, and cheating on the tests to get people in. And to the military's credit they thrash the guy’s career when they find out, so out of respect I won't mention any particular case. But what recruiter in their right mind would think my friend Rick a good potential mark? The hair longer then most women's should be a clear indication that he's NOT a good target! And don't give me the crap about “serving your country”! There is more then one way to "serve your country"! Voting, is serving your country. Joining the military, is serving your country. Opening a business and contributing to the failing economy is serving your country. Not becoming a permanent leech on Social Services and having enough kids to fill a small country is serving your country!
And any combination of the above 3... telemarketers selling me religion, or telemarketers selling me the military, are the most evil of all things.
Ok guys, I'm out, I gotta go call the telemarketers and try to sell them a slightly used religious pamphlet.
~Gwen
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