Sunday, April 10, 2011


I am sure everybody and their grandmother that is reading this has seen or heard of the song “Friday”. The singer, Rebecca Black, is now famous for it. If only it was a good thing…

For those living under a fucking rock that means that the song/music video quickly went viral. Reproducing at an astounding rate and quickly being raised to an epidemic outbreak level by the surgeon general. The Friday virus is highly contagious, spreading by minor contact with infected individuals, and is the first case of a human virus being spread through the internet. (In other news the US government is trying to figure out how this was done for possible biological weapon use) It appears to be non-lethal, but small children, the elderly, and those with compromised immune systems are recommended to be closely monitored just in case.

Symptoms include: having the song “Friday” stuck in your head for days on end, randomly singing off key, and mild fever. Severe cases have been witnessed breaking out in (off key) singing in large crowds, making parody versions of the “Friday” song and music video, and being confused if you should sit in the front or back seat of a car (incredibly amusing to onlookers when you’re the only one getting into the car). Still, doctors recommend wearing a dust mask (because it’s funny as hell when you get a dust mask tan line) and seeing a doctor is you develop any of the severe symptoms.

Oh, and some random woman named Gwenny has developed a vaccine for the dreaded Friday virus, she is selling it out of her apartme, er… office for a mere $100. Supplies are limited, make sure you purchase your vaccination before supplies run out.

OK! Now that that’s out of the way, obviously this is my own mockery of “Friday”. What brought it about? Why the newest “Friday” parody of course! God fucking damnit how many parody’s of this wannabe kindergarten song (ok class, lets sing the Friday song! Saturday, Sunday, Monday…) do we need?! Including the original and the horrendous religious version above I know of AT LEAST 8. Including one by some boy band, Conan O’Brian, a 10 minute play, and a piano ballad! Ok, seriously! I get parody, have you seen this site? Half of it is parody. But things quickly reach the point where it goes from being funny to being “are people seriously still making these?” So to all the people out there… I have one request.

MAKE IT STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This has been Gwen. Your pissed off, ranting redhead. And I hear she’s creating a new song “These are all the things in my backpack”… I can see the parodies now

*sings* These are all the things in my backpack. Note-book, note-book, text book, hand-ful of pen-cils, text book, an entire box of condoms.... *fades out*

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