Saturday, April 30, 2011


Is anybody else tired of that fucking term yet? Oh! It’s a “superfood”, its new and fantastic for you! FUCK YOU! It’s the same god damn thing that you’ve been eating but got a hip new name to get you morons who believe everything you read/hear and think you can sit on your ass and lose weight if you take enough pills.

By the way, try our limited time offer! For the low, low price of your soul and enough money to fund a small 3rd world country you can purchase the Quick Trim system! As made famous by Kim Kardashian and her less popular sisters! Just 18 easy payments of $49.99! Get yours today!

Hey look I’ve gone corporate.

Here, let’s look at what wikipedia says about superfoods:

Superfood is a term sometimes used to describe food with high phytonutrient content that may confer health benefits as a result. For example, blueberries are often considered a superfood (or superfruit) because they contain significant amounts of antioxidants, anthocyanins, vitamin C, manganese, and dietary fiber.

The term is not in common currency amongst dieticians and nutritional scientists, many of whom dispute the claims made that consuming particular foodstuffs can have a health benefit. There is no legal definition of the term and it has been alleged that this has led to it being over-used as a marketing tool.

Hmmmmm “no legal definition of the term” seems to be the key word. So that means you could call ANYTHING a superfood, right? Right?! Chicken and gravy? Superfood. McDonalds mcburger? Superfood. Justin Beiber? Crappy singer, but still a superfood.

*switches to stereotypical gay voice* You know what superfood makes me think of? It makes me think of GAY!!! It's superrrrrrrrrr!!!!!

How about we quit with the crappy terms and just say what it might be? The foods you’ve known for-fucking-ever are good for you are *GASP* good for you!!!! It doesn’t matter if your muffins have “superfood” blueberries or regular ones in it, it’s the same damn thing with a $3 markup for the “superfood” one.

This has been Gwen. Your pissed off, ranting redhead. And buy my superfood fudge rounds, only $19.99 a box and you’ll swear they taste healthier then the other ones.

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