Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Obama on Schools

I was going to put this into the Twit News post… but this got far, far too long to add to that. So for you’re reading pleasure, or masochism, here’s my opinion on Obama’s newest release on the schools in the US.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/yblog_upshot/20100927/us_yblog_upshot/obama-calls-for-longer-school-year

“President Obama said on the "Today" show Monday morning that American students attend school a month less than kids in other countries -- contending that the school-year gap puts them at a competitive disadvantage in the global economy.”

I won’t argue that a longer school year would help the kids in school because it probably would. His daughters also go to a private school because the public schools in Washington DC are utter shit (my words, not his). But I’m going to add my two cents on what else would help.

Here’s what else would help!

~Paying the teachers enough so that they don’t have to have a part time job with their students! You are going to high school, and you go every week because you’ll need your education to get a good job right? And then, at your part time job, after school, or on the weekends, or whenever, you get to work with your teacher who also works there… doing the same thing you do. Way to show an education is important!

~The school systems need to be completely, and entirely redesigned. I am usually not one for federally run anything, seeing at how pitifully they run things for the most part. But the education system I firmly believe needs to be federally run. Why? Lets say you live in Bumblefuck, Missouri. Your parents (and hence you) move to California. You are so far behind compared to the other students in your grade that you drop back one, possibly two grades! The system needs to be standardized so that no matter what state you live in you get the same education.

There is no reason that when you move from one part of the country to the other that you drop or jump one to two grades just by changing school districts!

And yes, as long as we’re making all the schools standardized I’d use the best schools in the country to make the standardization. And the kids would be moved to the appropriate grade. My apologies to the kids that drop back grades but it has to be done.

~I do not know if it is like this everywhere or just where I went to school in NC but you do not need 3 years of history! I remember you got to learn the state history all through one year of elementary school, again in middle school (junior high), and AGAIN in high school. Drop that down to part of a semester in elementary school and a full semester in high school and make the rest of it US history! Honestly if you’re doing the federally run school systems that should be the only difference between states.

Oh lookie, I learned about the Wright brothers in elementary school, and again in middle school… and again in high school… why?

~This is going to not be liked by a lot of people… but in high school have a “religious education” class. Not one teaching you a certain religion. The zealots would like that far too much, and it’s against the separation of church and state. No, a class to teach you about most of the religions out there; Christianity, Judaism, Islam, Buddhism, Hinduism, Wicca, Paganism, Voodoo, Atheism, Catholicism, etc. This is something done in several European countries and it does wonders for religious tolerance.

~Remove the “no child left behind” act Bush put into effect. Being able to hold a kid back one time in so many years does not help them. It just means they move on even if they don’t know the material they need to know for their next set of classes.

~And finally, put sex education back in school! And not this abstinence only bullshit that Bush pushed through. Teach them about condoms and birth control. Have them put condoms on bananas like they used to. Teach them about STDs and how a baby is made. They’re going to have sex whether you teach them about it or not, if you don’t it just means they’re going to do it the unsafe! And I can even give you proof on that! Look at the teenage pregnancies and STD rate since the abstinence only crap got put into effect. It’s more then doubled!

This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead. And now I’m going to go teach your kids how to put a condom on a banana!

Monday, September 27, 2010

Door-to-Door Dumbasses

I’ve dealt with the door-to-door dumbasses before, they call themselves different things, Jehova’s Witnesses, Christians, Mormons, etc etc... they’re all dumbasses though. Today I had a pair of them come to my door, usually I torment them in some way or give them some smart ass reply depending on what they’re opening line is. I am sorry in advance, I had been awake for less then an hour and I wasn’t on top of my game. Here’s the one they got:

DtDDs: Hello, we’re from . Have you heard the good news?

Me: Yes, you’re leaving.

DtDDs: *blank stare as the door closes*

When the god damned fucking hell are you dumbasses going to learn that we don’t need you doing this door to door shit, or the pamphlet crap. Nobody reads your little pamphlets, we just chuck them in the trash. Or if they’re as spiteful as I am they’ll rip them up right in front of you.

Christianity is the dominant religion in this country at an astounding approximate 82%, that means that 4 out of every 5 people are a Christian. In comparison Unaffiliated (including Agnostic and Atheist) make up about 11.5%, Judaism is at about 1.5%, Islam about 1%, Buddhism about .7%, Hinduism about .4%, and other (which includes Wicca, other Pagan religions and New Age religions) is at an ever growing 1.4%. And yes, I’m aware that only makes 98.6%, that’s why they all say approximate or about.

EVERYBODY in this country knows about Christianity. We don’t need you going door to door trying to convert us, we don’t need your stupid little pamphlets. If we wanted to be Christian we would be! I mean it wouldn’t be hard, there’s a church of some denomination on about every other street in any moderate sized town. I can drive downtown and I will pass at least 5 churches before I reach there, and I live in a town with about 17,000 people (2000 census). This is opposed to where I used to live, which has 200,000 people (again, 2000 census). There you had one on about every street!

And if you turn them down, and don’t close the door fast enough they revert to “You’re going to Hell and God doesn’t want you to go to Hell!

God wants you to save me from going to Hell for not believing in him. The same Hell that he created to punish me if I don’t believe in him. So if I don’t believe in him then I go to the Hell that he created to punish me for not believing in him and the only way not to go to Hell is to believe in him… kind of circular logic there isn’t it?!

That’s it, I’m done.

This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead. And would you like to join me at the Church of Slammed Doors?

Saturday, September 25, 2010

TWitN: 9/18/10-9/24/10

This week in the news! US dollars may get a re-design if one group has its way, the designs they’ve made are actually pretty damn cool. Some dumb Republican is getting in trouble for a comment she made over a decade ago on a TV show, it’s not quite what you’re thinking. And Katy Perry and Elmo will NOT be singing a song together on Sesame Street, poor, poor Elmo.

~The Dollar ReDe$ign Project has developed some new designs for the US dollar and have started a petition to get the US government to seriously consider the ideas and designs they’ve made. Their designs are all different sizes, all are different colors, updated pictures on them, and a vertical design (up and down) since that is how they’re usually handled. Personally I think this ROCKS! Different sizes means that the blind can more easily use them. The different colors I’m all for. The US has some of the most boring bills in the world. Add some damn color to them, and not little gold “10” or whatever… make them colorful and quit trying to give them “bling”. The vertical design is kind of cool, I don’t mind it, and considering how many bill accepting machines there are now it does kind of make sense. Here’s what the current ideas look like… and I like all of them EXCEPT the 1 dollar bill.

http://i.huffpost.com/gen/201963/DOLLAR.jpg

I don’t think we should have ANY recent president on the dollars, no Bush, no Obama, Clinton maybe, but ONLY because he got the US to the highest national surplus we’ve ever had.

Enough on the dollar, lets move onto something more interesting.

~Some dumb bitch Republican is in trouble for “dabbling in witchcraft” over a decade ago. I was all ready to jump all over this story on them giving the woman shit (me defending a Republican… first time for everything) and being religious pricks until I got further down and read this:

“O'Donnell told Bill O'Reilly that scientists have created mice that possess human brains; she said on "Politically Incorrect" that she would not lie to Nazis if she was hiding Jews in her house; and she reportedly said that women should not be permitted entry to military service institutions. The left has also criticized her denunciation of masturbation.”

This woman is fucking crazy. Along with that she’s called condoms “anti-human”. You’re calling condoms fucking anti-human and you’re talking about giving Jews over to the Nazis if you were hiding them?!?!?! You need to be slapped! Preferably with a giant fucking condom!

Has anybody else noticed how downright insane some of the conservative Republican women are?! I mean damn, denouncing masturbation? Really, in today’s society? Excuse me but I’m going to go get my vibrator.

And saying that women shouldn’t be in the military. Yes, lets just give up all the hard earned rights we’ve earned through feminism why don’t we…

Congrats to you O’Donnell, maybe you want to pump out babies all the time (by the way did your last name used to be Duggar?) no masturbation, no condoms (I assume that means no birth control either since it’s the same damn thing as condoms!), but some of us prefer to not be freaking cattle.

Honestly there’s not much else I can say on this one.

~Top story! http://omg.yahoo.com/blogs/a-line/sesame-street-pulls-controversial-katy-perry-duet/624

Elmo and Katy Perry will not be singing a toned down version of “Hot and Cold” together on Sesame Street. Not because the song is inappropriate, the altered version was just fine. But because Katy Perry is showing a little too much flesh. I wasn’t going to do this story, I try to stay away from celebrity shit and I’ve done a few too many lately for my liking. I decided to not for the actual article, but for some of the comments left on it.

“she is right in line with Lady Gag Gag. They both are pitiful role models." And others like it.

You know what, yes, she's a pitiful role model. Unlike Britney, oh, wait... Paris? Nope. Hell, how about Martha Stewart, oh damn I forgot about her jail time. When exactly WAS the last time we had a celebrity that was a good role model(male or female) again? Oh yea, NEVER! Cause last time I heard most celebrities are on drugs, sleep around, are cheating on their spouse, having dog fights *cough Vick cough*, are shooting people, or are just out and out assholes!!!! By comparison showing a little flesh isn’t all that bad is it? Speaking of flesh, you haven’t taken your child to a beach or a pool have you? Cause you know… bikinis show just a tad more…

I bet you listen to rap music, which glorifies all kinds of negative shit that I’m not getting into, but you’re complaining about a low cut dress.

This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead. And sunny day everyday! Boobs ok! Can you tell me how to get, how to get to Sesame Street! How to get to Perry's boobs! How to get to Sesame Street!



*I do not own Sesame Street or their song in any way, if you don’t know the difference between a parody and ownership of their work then please shove your head into a running wood chipper.*

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Not a Michael Vick post

You know, I was going to make a post on Michael Vick being put back into play in the NFL. Please note I said WAS. I’ve decided the sick, dog fighting bastard isn’t worth my time or blog space. You can go to probably a thousand other blogs if you want to read about the asshole. I’m sure there’s plenty out there about how good it is for the game that he’s back in the NFL, and others on how heinous it is that they let such a bad role model back in. Sorry, but my blog is going to be Dick free… oops, did I say Dick? I meant Vick, how clumsy of me to say what he is instead of his name…

So instead of the post I was going to make on that guy, here’s the URL for a woman on Youtube whom I’ve taken a liking to. She makes some really good points in her videos and is rather amusing.

http://www.youtube.com/user/ZOMGitsCriss

This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead. And GET THE QUARTERBACK!!!!!!!

Monday, September 20, 2010

Chat Room Etiquette

It’s downright amazing how many people just don’t understand chat room etiquette (or online at all for that matter). So to make you guys not so ignorant (STUPID) I made you up a handly little guide

~ If you use the word “noob” a ton, you yourself are generally the noob.

~ If the chat room is for adults then it means there’s adult content normally. This does not mean that since you’re “really mature for your age” Mr. 11 Year Old that it’s meant for you to join. Come back when you have at least hit the ‘teen years, teen… not tween.

~ If the room is GLBT friendly/safe/whatever then you will generally get automatically booted when you come in and go “God damn faggots!” or something to that nature.

~ Do not enter a room and the first or second thing you say is that you’re horny/any single ladies(ever notice they never look for men? Even if it’s a female saying it.)/you want sex etc etc. Best case scenario you get booted(assuming its not the Cyber Fuck Room), worst case scenario is it’s a 3D chat like IMVU and somebody in there is going to turn into a giant fucking humanoid spider and traumatize your poor little mind.

~ When you enter a room check to see who the mods are, it’s generally not a good idea to piss them off. For example going “Bitch, shut up!” to them can net you either a warning to watch your mouth or a boot out the door depending on their mood and what else you’ve said.

~ Try to use proper fucking English. Yes, we all know text speak, along with most of the online abbreviations, but there’s a big difference between “how r u” and some shit that wouldn’t make sense to me even drunk.

~ If you and your friend enter a room, stick to the language being spoken in the room. If it’s a private conversation, or you want to speak a different language go to a private chat. Google translate is just a mouse click away, and there is usually somebody in the room with enough spite *looks innocent* to start translating your stuff and posting it to the chat room… or just boot you.

~ Real world rules apply. If you start insulting everybody: boot. Trying to proselytize: boot. Being a creepy mother fucker: boot. If the giant fucking humanoid spider shows up and is mainly “flirting” with you: very big fucking boot.

This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead. And if I have to tell you one more god damn time to quit using the word “noob” I’m going to put my boot all up in your ass!


*100 bonus points if you know the movie part of that last line is from… bonus points have no value, fyi*

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Pope appologies for sex abuse scandal...

This one couldn’t wait until the Saturday Twit News post. Knowing my luck it’ll be the only good article this week, but oh well.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20100918/ap_on_re_eu/eu_pope_britain

“During his U.K. visit, Benedict XVI says he is ashamed of priests' "unspeakable" sexual abuse of children.”

I’m going to keep this one short… if the Pope is ashamed of the priests’ sexual abuse of children then he, and the Vatican, can QUIT SUPPORTING THEM! The priests already have a rule where they can’t get married or they lose their priesthood, make another that says if you molest children you lose it too! Quit buying them the best lawyers, quit giving them back their jobs when they get out of jail, or, quite possibly the most sickening, when a scandal comes up they just move the priest to a new district that doesn’t know about his pedophilic tendencies.

They get charged with child molestation then suspend their priesthood until the government of the country they’re in finds them guilty or innocent. And if found guilty then take their priesthood from them! If found innocent, then by all means give it back, I’m not for punishing the innocent.

But it’s not like this is a new issue, the priests have been doing this long enough it’s actually become a card for other sex offenders… “…well… I was raped by a priest when I was a child…”

If the Catholic Church, the Vatican, and the Pope want to actually show how “ashamed” they are of the unspeakable sexual abuse of children then they need to purge their ranks of these child abusing monsters! Until then, actions speak louder then any words you say and by keeping them in your church you show silent approval of what they’re doing.


Now, before I get grief from any Catholics. I have Catholic friends; they’re very cool for the most part, we don’t always agree on religious stuff obviously, but we get along fine.

This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead. And I say we bring back a proud Roman tradition and give the pedophile priests to the lions.

TWitN: 9/11/10-9/17/10

Yes, this is a long one actually. It was going to be a really short one until yesterday when the news decided to go "Have some fun shit!!!"

This week in the news! A tiny cat village has over 660 cats, they’re so cute. Lady Gaga and John McCain have a media fight over Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell. The Queen of England is having lunch with an insane criminal; I don’t write them I just report them. A teenager in NC (NC again? Why does all the interesting stuff happen there when I’m not there anymore?) is having legal issues with her “religious” nose piercing. And finally a woman sneaks into a MAXIMUM SECURITY JAIL to confront the felon believed to be linked to her missing daughter’s fate. How. The. Fuck.

~Caboodle Ranch in Madison County, Florida is home to over 600 abandoned and stray kitties! They are all kept up to date on their shots, and all are fixed so as to not create any more cats… which would quickly multiply into the thousands with so many cats living there otherwise. The ranch is set up like a cute little village. It has a city hall, Walmart (complete with cat food cans in the carts), streets, houses, etc etc. It was unintentionally founded by Craig Grant and is supported strictly on Craig’s out of pocket expenses and donations. The cats are not up for adoption. They all have a home at the ranch. Mr. Grant recommends going to an animal shelter to get find a pet cat if you want one… where they’re on death row. The ranch IS open to visitors, although you should remember it’s not a tourist attraction, he says he gets about 30 visitors a month or so. So everybody go visit the kitties and give him donations! His website is http://www.caboodleranch.com/ and there’s a Facebook also you can visit, but I’m not giving you a Facebook link.

~Lady Gaga and John McCain are going back and forth over the upcoming Senate vote to repeal the gloriously stupid Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell (henceforth referred to as DADT) policy. McCain is threatening to filibuster at the Senate, for those that are ignorant to politics that’s where he doesn’t shut his trap long enough for them to vote. And Gaga is using Twitter to get her “Lil Monsters”, her pet name for her fans, to call up their Senators and tell them to get their asses to the Senate to vote! Why she wants them all to go vote is a Senate majority (60 out of the 100) can force the idiot trying to filibuster to shut the fuck up!

Now that that’s out of the way, I actually don’t mind DADT. There’s no real reason to be telling your sexual orientation unless you’re supposed to seduce somebody for a mission. When you’re serving in the military you’re working, you don’t tell you’re gay, and nobody can ask if you’re gay. Fine. Your sexual orientation has absolutely no place when you’re off in another country doing Goddess knows what for the military. That being said, I think that if it’s found out you’re gay that you get discharged is complete BULLSHIT! Oh, John there gets a stiffy over guys instead of girls… DEAL WITH IT! If you’re straight then he doesn’t want you, so why does it matter? What are you going to do when you get out of the military and work in civilian society? Gay people work the same places as straight people and they can’t be fired for it unlike in our oh so progressive military. You fire a guy because he’s gay and you’ll be visited by the ACLU stupid fast. This is the military, you’re all adults, grow the fuck up!

~The Queen of England is having lunch with an insane criminal… now… here’s the link.

Yes, that’s the insane criminal in the photo is the Pope. I don’t even have to touch this one really with all the protests happening in England. People are calling for him to be arrested for crimes against humanity, for an old thing he put out telling the church to cover up the priests “interaction with the young”, for his willing activity in the Nazi Youth when he was younger. So I’m not going to really touch this article. I will say this though. Why is it that Jesus supposedly always enters the body of somebody always so damn old? Every Pope I’ve ever seen elected (oh, yea, and who Jesus enters is evidently elected also!) is some old guy that looks like he’s about to fall over. If Jesus can enter the body of people why doesn’t he pick some 23 year old buff guy that’s going to live for more then a decade or 2? Personal theory is that they can’t elect a young Pope because he might have some progressive thoughts!

NEXT!

~ http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/us_rel_piercing_church Girl has a nose piercing, it violates the school dress code, blah blah, religion, blah blah, violates First Amendment, blah blah, Church of Body Modification… wha?

The Church of Body Modification? You’re kidding right? I did read over the site. And to me it sounds more like a way to get around business and school dress codes then a religion. It is true that various faiths have ritual body modification; the one that first comes to mind is a couple of ones I don’t know the names of that have ritual tattooing. Look it up yourself.

“The Church of Body Modification represents a collection of members practicing ancient and modern body modification rites. We believe these rites are essential to our spirituality. Practicing body modification and engaging in body manipulation rituals strengthen the bond between mind, body, and soul. By doing so, we ensure that we live as spiritually complete and healthy individuals.”

I call bullshit. The main reason I call bullshit is that other then them practicing ancient and modern body modification rites it doesn’t say a thing about what they believe! You could make anything a religion like that… how about drinking?!

“The Church of Alcoholism represents a collection of members practicing ancient and modern brewing methods and alcohol rites. We believe these rites are essential to our spirituality. Practicing brewing and engaging in alcohol rituals strengthen the bond between mind, body, and soul. By doing so, we ensure that we live as spiritually complete and healthy individuals.”

And yes, I can name a few religions that have alcohol rituals too… like oh, how about various forms of Christianity and Paganism. Christianity has where the wine is turned into Jesus’s blood and drunk from a communal cup. And Pagans have various ones, the most common is taking a sip out of a communal cup before rituals.

~The mother of missing American teen Natalee Holloway sneaked into a maximum security Peruvian jail and had a chat with Joran van der Sloot about her daughter's fate. Joran is in jail for murdering a woman, and is the main suspect in the disappearance of Holloway’s daughter. She snuck in with some documentary filmmaker who isn’t really worth mentioning and made it all the way to the guy’s cell and talked to him for 5 minutes before the staff found and removed her.

HOW THE HELL DO YOU SNEAK INTO A MAXIMUM SECURITY PRISON?!?!?!?!? You aren’t supposed to be able to sneak in or out of those places without setting off a few hundred alarms. You know if she snuck in that means people can sneak out! And I’ll bet you that the only reason they found and removed her (and probably the guy too) is because they were doing their scheduled rounds, turned the corner and went “OH FUCK ONE OF THE INMATES IS FREE!!!!!!!” The woman is lucky that she and the other dude didn’t just get turned into Swiss cheese! I seriously wonder how many people have escaped and had it covered up if her and some film maker without any special training managed to sneak in that far.

This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead. And I’m going to get completely, and utterly ratassed at the Church of Alcoholism.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Random Ass Post

Stuff that just happens in my life is not going to get posted on here much. Why? Because it’s generally not funny.

THE GODS OF LASAGNA ARE TRYING TO KILL ME!

I was in my damn kitchen, making a damn lasagna, and they tried to drop my kitchen’s damn light covering on my damn head!!!!! Damn… did I say damn enough? Damn-it I’m not sure.

They’re trying to kill me for blasphemy! I put feta cheese on the lasagna, so, in their divine VENGENCE they decided to drop a 5lb chunk of glass upon my head!

There was a pop! And then the light got brighter and THUD! And the Gods of the Unholy Lasagna missed!!!!!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHA! YOU MISSED DO YOU HEAR ME!?

Oh damn… lasagna lightning… BOOM!

This has been Gwen, your damn pissed off, ranting redhead. And this post was brought to you by damn blunt force head trauma.

Sunday, September 12, 2010

TWitN: 9/4/10-9/10/10

This week in the news! A pastor in Florida plans to burn the Quran on September 11th (update, it’s been postponed). A US student tries to electrocute himself, evidently he didn’t try hard enough. Screaming children are BANNED from a restaurant in NC, WAHHHHHHHH!!!!! And Canada unveils a new speed bump, you gotta see it to believe it.

~Top story! A pastor in Gainesville, Florida was planning on hosting a Quran burning at his church on 9/11. “Was” being the key word, it’s been postponed due to political pressure, I’m still reporting it though. Come on, really? You’re going to make it this easy?! Is the pastor fucking stupid?! I think he’s drunk too much of Jesus’ blood. Remember a few years back when somebody made a comic that satirized Allah? The Muslim community in the Middle East went APE SHIT! You can’t do shit like this and not expect there to be repercussions! The Middle East is not the fucking US or Europe. They still have blasphemy laws.

In short, unless you want to add even more people to the ranks of the terrorist groups and have more of them trying to shoot at the soldiers we have over in the Middle East then DON’T FUCKING DO IT ASSHOLE! Or how about this... we can paint your religion in the same heavy handed paint brush you’re painting the Muslims with! All Christians are abortion doctor shooting, Quran burning, childing molesting, funeral protesting psychos. And, in protest, I am going to host a Bible burning on December 25th. Next story.

(Note: I’m not really hosting a Bible burning or believe the last line above… I’m proving a point.)

~“An American student whose heart stopped after he deliberately electrocuted himself in a science class is suing his teacher for not warning him it was dangerous.”

“Dubois and his parents claim teacher Thomas Kelley did not tell him and other students of the dangers of the demonstration power cords in their electrical trades class.”

The kid by the way is 18 and did it on a dare (he’d get a Mountain Dew for doing it…). You know, at 18, if you don’t know electricity will kill you then you need to shove a fork into an electric socket. It’s an electrical trades class!!!! Being in it to begin with means you are going to be working in some profession that deals with the electrical field! I sure as hell would never hire this kid if he doesn’t know electricity kind of hurts!

Oh, ahuck ahuck, I’ll get a free pop if I put these here 2 clamps on my nipples and turn it on? Swell! I get a free pop! Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-ZAP!!!!

And moving on.

~The Olde Salty restaurant in Carolina Beach, North Carolina has posted a new rule for its restaurant. “Screaming Children Will NOT Be Tolerated!” I am going to get a lot of flack for this, but I think it ROCKS! I think it needs to be put into effect in a few other places, like movie theaters.

Now, let me explain. On the one hand if you have a baby then when they’re crying it’s normally that they want food, sleep, a diaper change, or to be cuddled. And assuming you’re a good parent you’re going to try to get them to be quiet. I doubt that I or the restaurant would get on you about it if you’re trying to quiet them down. On the other hand if you have an older child that screams like a banshee because they’re not getting what they want then, or you’re just ignoring it then you need to be drug outside and beat until your 2 brain cells rub together.

I get this at work, there’s a person that always brings their 2 children along, 1 is a toddler, the other is probably preschool-kindergarten age. The older kid screams from the time she walks into the store to the time they leave! I know why the restaurant put this rule into effect… it’s because the other patrons don’t want to hear your hell spawn screaming their entire meal. There’s nothing like going to a nice sit down restaurant, paying $15+ a meal, before beverages and tip, and having some child screaming behind you the entire time. If you can’t control your child then either: go somewhere for kids where one more screaming child won’t matter, hire a babysitter, or stay the fuck home!

~And the final story. Canada unveils a new speed bump, an optical illusion of a child. This one needs to be seen to be believed…

http://news.yahoo.com/s/yblog_upshot/20100908/od_yblog_upshot/canada-unveils-new-speed-bump-optical-illusions-of-children

I am sure it will work, for a little while. After about the first month everybody is going to be used to it and drive over “Pavement Patty” without a second thought. Then this is going to happen.

Somebody is driving down the road. “Oh look, they put in another one of those painted speed bumps.” *THUMP THUMP* “OH MY GOD!!!! I RAN OVER A CHILD!!!!!!!!”

That is what is going to happen! You are conditioning people to run over children, in real life! This isn’t a video game, this isn’t on a TV screen, this is in real life! I hope guys get this thing removed before people start running people over without realizing they were real, and not some stupid 3D painting on the ground.

This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead. And now I’m waiting for GTA 37(or whatever number they’re up to) where all the speed bumps are painting of kids on the road.

Monday, September 6, 2010

TWitN: 8/28/10-9/3/10

Ok, this is a little late, I’ve been busy. And there’s going to be a date change on these… from now on they’re going to be posted on Saturday.

This week in the news! A company is caught writing fake reviews for its customers, nice job idiots. Drake University has a new ad campaign; you’re going to love this. And you can bite me but I’m going to fangirl over the mystery article.

First off! “A high-profile public relations firm in the video game industry, Reverb Communications represents major clients like Harmonix and MTV Games, as well as their products, such as Rock Band. They also represent smaller studios that sell games through the iTunes Store.”

“According to the FTC, Reverb employees posed as regular users and posted fake user reviews about their clients' games on the iTunes store.”

I just want to say congrats to Reverb for their AMAZING show of trustworthiness. I mean after all… if you’re going to go that far to make sure your clients get good reviews you MUST be a fantastic company. And I’m sure all the games you faked reviews for are completely awesome. And for those too dense to pick up on the sarcasm the company is idiotic and should’ve known that they’d get caught! What were you thinking?! Did you go; “Oh look! This game sucks! Fuck it, lets fake some good reviews anyways.” Not that I get games from the iTunes store, but if I did I sure as hell would avoid any that were given reviews by this oh so crappy company.

Next story. Drake University has a new ad campaign to get people to come to their school… its called D+. “The Drake Advantage: Your potential + our opportunities” equals what? Does it equal a D+? Did your advertising department COMPLETELY fucking forget that a D+ is just above failing? Or did you guys train your advertising department yourself? You’d think that a university wouldn’t want to advertise ANYTHING they do as being a D+. You guys must be kind of low on the grading scale. I sure hope you don’t train medical staff there… it might be kind of scary if you’re having surgery from somebody that went to D+ University.

And now… I must fangirl. METROID OTHER M WAS RELEASED ON THE 31ST! I love the Metroid series, exploring everywhere, jumping around, some decent puzzles. Ridley is back as always, being the badass dragon thing that he is. The main character from the Metroid series is Samus Aran, and this installment of the series actually tells about her past, which up until this game fans have only gotten little pieces of. And, for the feminists out there, Samus Aran was the FIRST female video game hero(although you didn’t find that out in the first game until the end of the game when she was shown without her helmet).

This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead. And I’ll bet you money the Reverb guys are graduates from D+ University.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Dream

I had a dream last night…

Just a normal dream, not the one where I take over the planet, or turn all my enemies into Skittles and taste the rainbow… this was just a normal dream.

I made a sandwich and ate it… a pastrami sandwich if you really want to know.

Evidently… I went to bed hungry last night.

This has been Gwen, your pissed off, ranting redhead. And I’m FUCKING BORING! *throws hands up and walks away*

Thursday, September 2, 2010

The Powerpuff Girls!

I was playing my game the other day, just playing my game, Guild Wars, cause that’s what geeks with no money do instead of WoW. So anyways I was playing my game and a guild member starts talking about old cartoons. She went through a couple them and then said the opening line for the Powerpuff Girls. And THAT’S when I realized it!

"Sugar, and spice, and everything nice." That’s the line...

THE POWERPUFF GIRLS ARE MADE OF RUMMMMMMM!!!!!!!

Rum is nice! Rum is very nice! Rum and coke is even nicer!

That’s what the "Chemical X" is, its RUM!!!!!


It also explains some of their enemies. An overgrown monkey with a brain coming out his skull, a gang that is green, I think they even had an enemy made of snot.

You'd have to be drunk to hallucinate these things as enemies! And I blame the RUM!!!!

This has been Gwen, your very… very drunk, ranting redhead. And I'm gonna drink me a Powerpuff Girl. *hic*